A Mother is Born

Preschool

2011-09-20T20:55:00.001-04:00

Our days have been filled with many "firsts" recently. This girl started preschool last Tuesday.

I can't believe how big she looks in that picture!

Anyway, she will go to preschool 2 days a week, 2.5 hours each day, to the preschool that Nathan went to (and thrived in) last year that we love so much.

Her daddy and I took her last Tuesday morning, after catching a few quick pictures of her. As we were waiting for an appropriate time to leave, Jenna was begging us to take her to preschool. She was just that excited!

We walked her in, trailing behind her with both the video camera and the digital in hand. Apparently we wish to remember this day :) Looking back at the footage of this momentous occasion, we will see that she dove right in (how very Jenna-like), not missing a beat, and could hardly wait for us to leave so she could begin her day alone. Should we have guessed it would go any differently?!

I picked her up, had a very good report for her teacher ("She is bouncy!" her teacher said...), and took my newest preschooler to lunch with her Grammy.

She's been to preschool 3 times so far and is absolutely loving it. Any trepidation we may have had with regard to her young-ish age has been dispelled for now. She is doing great and is so proud to have this experience to call her very own.

I am a mommy to a kindergartener AND a preschooler... and I just can't believe it!

Tomorrow

2011-09-12T21:39:00.000-04:00

"You're only a day away"

After much delay caused by the massive flooding and devastation in our region, tomorrow is the day that Nathan finally starts Kindergarten. Also due to power outages and other flood-related issues, Nathan will not start at his normal elementary school, but will start his first ever day of Kindergarten at... wait for it ...the HIGH SCHOOL! So, as if the first day anticipation isn't bad enough, now I have this to contend with!

And if just Nathan beginning Kindergarten at high school is not enough, Jenna will also begin her first day of pre-school tomorrow! It'll be a jam-packed day for sure and I'll likely be quite a sight.

It still doesn't feel real! I packed his lunch and her snack, set them up to be assembled in the fridge, and set out all their first day of school clothes, backpacks, and lunchboxes.

It is all very surreal at the moment. It's pretty safe to say that I have the first day jitters for sure.

Anticipation

2011-09-07T21:26:00.000-04:00

I feel the anticipation level rising. It is manifesting in lots of different ways in everyone. But I can see it; it is tangible in Nathan and it breaks my heart.

We've had a few good days leading up to these first momentous days of Kindergarten. On Monday's holiday, we took a short trip as a family and just enjoyed spending time together. Yesterday, I planned a date night with Nathan - I took him to his favorite restaurant, Texas Roadhouse a.k.a "the peanut place." It was just he and I and we had a great time talking and spending quiet time together. We split a steak and had silly conversation over their sweet yeast rolls and a few bites of their onion blossom. I took him afterwards and bought him a Star Wars Lightsaber as a surprise; he has wanted one for a long time. He was thrilled! All in all, we had a great time. We held hands a lot, stole a lot of hugs and kisses, and just enjoyed being together.

My Handsome Date

Today was Nathan's orientation for Kindergarten. I was thankful for the fact that we would be able to go with him and get him settled for a little bit before he starts his big day (supposedly) tomorrow. We enjoyed playing with the blocks in his classroom, exploring all the new places, and he even got to ride a the school bus in preparation for the big day.

So that's all well and good, right? We're all set to start Kindergarten tomorrow, right?

No, probably not. ::sigh::

I woke up to rain this morning...pouring rain. It has poured with that same vigor all day long. Flood waters are rising in our area and many roads, underpasses, and low-lying areas are flooded and the river and creeks are rising at a rapid pace. And if that's not bad enough, the rain is supposed to continue into the night and throughout tomorrow morning...perhaps for another 7 days here and there! Thankfully, we live atop a big hill, so we are definitely safe from harm. But many people from the region are being adversely affected by the flooding and I'm pretty sure they're going to cancel school for tomorrow.

On top of that, we had a few tears at bedtime tonight. Nathan is sad to to be leaving me all day every day. In the 5 years of his life, for the exception of 2 days when his dad and I went away for our anniversary last year, we have seen each other for most of the hours in each day of his life. This is going to be a huge adjustment for us both and I know that he is feeling it. I am feeling it.

So we are both growing sick with anticipation. And now we are likely putting school off for another day, giving us another day together, yes, but also giving us time to anticipate and anxiously await that monumental first day for another 24 hours.

We will survive, but the anticipation is killing us!

Eight Whole Months

2011-08-30T13:52:00.002-04:00

Geesh... I'll tell you. These monthly birthdays never cease to take me by surprise. I always feel lost in the conundrum of feeling like he's been in our family forever and unable to believe that it has already been eight months since he arrived. It's a strange feeling, for sure.

But here we are today! My boy is 8 months old! Where did the time go?!

He has 6 teeth, can army crawls like a maniac, can pull up to a standing position, and can cruise on occasion from one surface to another.
He is sweet and cuddly, bubbly and smiley, and he is a mama's boy; there is no doubt about that!
He has been sleeping through the night for 3+ months now, which shocked this mama beyond belief, and he has really started to nail down his nap schedule, napping once in the morning for about an hour and once in the afternoon for 2-3 hours straight. Occasionally he takes a cat nap after dinner.
He, who once loved his homemade purees, recently started shaking his head when I offered them and so is now eating mostly table food when he wants. He loves pretty much everything I have offered, but I'd say his favorite is avocado. He never turns it down.
He adores his brother and sister and they adore him right back. They play so gently with him and he lights up when he sees them.

To say we are blessed beyond belief to have him in our lives is an understatement. I feel so very blessed to be his mama and I look forward to seeing him grow and change in the days ahead.

Happy 8 Months, my darling! I love you so much! -Mama

The End of an Era

2011-08-27T14:24:00.002-04:00

There was a time when this boy was my entire world. When days were spent between the two of us, trying to figure out this motherhood thing. He was my guinea pig. He was the whole reason I stayed at home at all.

I hardly remember that little boy. In fact, it is easy for me to forget just how small he once was. It's easy to forget that he was a toddler once. When I look at the refined 5-year-old that he is today, it is hard for me to remember that he was once a little guy.

During my pregnancy with him early in 2006, I knew that I would stay at home with him after he was born. I quit my nursing job fairly early in that pregnancy due to my morning sickness and finished my last semester for my BSN. I remember the summer months before he was born, just daydreaming about having a little baby and wondering what on earth I was supposed to do with a little person all day long. I remember thinking I'd be ok with a baby, but that I had NO earthly idea what I would do with a toddler. Oh, how times have changed.

Since he came along, we have added two more to our fold; kids who don't even have a real identity aside from being their brother or sister. His poor sister follows him around endlessly, just trying to keep up with the busy boy that he is. She idolizes him and adores him in every way. Sure, they argue and bicker (like I remember doing with my siblings), but they love each other to death. And don't even get me started on Nicholas and Nathan; those two have a special relationship all of their own. I love to watch them together.

Here we are on the fringes of what will be his first-ever real breaking away. The boy who became my reason to be a stay-at-home-mom in the first place will soon fly the coop and enter Kindergarten. I won't spend my days in the old familiar ways, saying, "Nathan, get down from the counter!" or "Nathan, be quiet and take a nap!". It seems like this house may feel a bit empty for a while.

You may remember the angst I felt with regard to the boy's first birthday, and I am likening those feelings to the ones I am feeling at the moment. There is just a general dread for the future because time is flying by at rapid pace and I, for the life of me, cannot figure out how to push the pause button. My stomach is in knots when I think about the way the last 5+ years have gone by me with the snap of a finger, and even moreso when I think about how I hardly remember it all.

I am fine... we will all be fine... Nathan will do great, I have no worries with regard to that. But this end of an era is going to shake things up a bit and I am just going to have to adjust to it all.

The Ultimate Cram

2011-08-24T14:02:00.003-04:00

I was laying in bed last night while on my computer. I have taken school lunch to a whole new level, I'm sure, and have gone obsessive-compulsive about what to pack Nathan to take to school and what said lunch should be packed in. The poor child probably doesn't even care, but I have taken this whole lunch thing on as my own personal mission. ::sigh::

But then it hit me. In just two weeks, my firstborn baby will be headed out into this world permanently. This isn't just preschool, folks. This is the real deal: 5 days a week, 6 hours a day, 180 days out of the year. This is the big leagues.

And then I started wondering if we had prepared him well enough to be out in the world. It is such a cruel place and such a difficult place to be a Christian anymore. I laid awake with my head spinning with thoughts about his preparation to this point.

did we teach him enough about Jesus?

did we teach him how to be obedient to authorities?

did we teach him how to share?

did we teach him how to love others?

did we instruct him properly in his ABCs & his numbers?

have we shown him how to color within in the lines?

So many questions, many yet to be answered. Will he thrive? The thoughts of everything he will go through are overwhelming and suffocating.

And then... (Thank You, Lord)...

Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
      And lean not on your own understanding;
      In all your ways acknowledge Him,
      And He shall direct your paths. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

I suppose this is where the "trust" comes in. While I am not a perfect parent, I have done my best to teach Nathan how to live. And not only teach him, I have tried to show him in and through my own life. And I guess this is the part where I let go a little, give him back into God's hands, and start letting God guide his little life while he is away.

I am excited to see how God is going to work in directing Nathan's paths. I can't wait to see the testimony of God's presence in Nathan's experience at school this year.

Starting Over

2011-08-23T14:45:00.000-04:00

I keep coming back to this dead blog every now and then, wishing the pages were filled of cute stories of my kids, very deep thoughts I have had, and/or just some commentary on my crazy life, but alas, they aren't. I just have let this ball drop and months of cute memories of my kids have slipped like sand between my fingertips. Makes me sad.

SO...

I am going to pick this ball back up again. With my oldest babe entering Kindergarten in just 2 short weeks and my middlest babe starting preschool in about 3 short weeks, and my youngest babe on the verge of doing a full, real crawl (and not just this army crawling business), I am feeling the desire to get back to work here recording all of these things.

EEK...I hope I can hack it.

Dear Nicholas

2011-05-16T13:55:00.000-04:00

Dear Nicholas,

Did you know that you are the light of my life? That with one smile, one giggle, or one coo you make my day brighter? Did you know how hopelessly and endlessly in love with you I am? I can't get enough!

Today you finally figured out how to roll from your back to your belly. In the picture above, you had just rolled over and were grinning from ear to ear. Now maybe when you roll over in the middle of the night, you'll be able to find your way back to your belly to get back to sleep. I know it's a long shot, but here's hoping!

You are just the smiliest baby. I carry you around everywhere and anywhere we go, you grin from ear to ear at the people around you. You love the ladies at church and are particularly fond of your Miss Danielle. You are content and happy to be around and I love how very easy going you are. And if your smile wasn't contagious, that little giggle of yours certainly is! You have been particularly giggly today and I just love it. Oh my goodness, when you get going, the two of us have such a hard time controlling ourselves! I suppose it doesn't help that you are ticklish in every square inch of your body. I love, love, love the fact that you get the hiccups when you laugh. You are so sweet.

I am so thankful that you are part of our lives. You are one more arrow in our quiver and when God gave you to us, He knew exactly what He was doing. He couldn't have given us a better addition to our family. We are so thankful to have you in our lives.

The days are flying by quickly and it is bittersweet. I wish things would slow way down, but yet I can't wait to see what the days have in store for us next. I am cherishing every moment, savoring each memory, and I'm looking forward to the lifetime of memories we have yet to make together.

I love you, my son. I always, always will.

Love,

Mommy

Nothing warms my heart like....

2011-03-31T22:59:00.002-04:00

...turning around to see my eldest son holding my youngest son, holding his hand with his head bowed, whispering a quiet prayer for him. Praying for him to be strong in the Lord.

It doesn't get much better than that.

Blessings

2011-03-21T14:19:00.002-04:00

I am learning a lot about God these days as I work on drawing closer to Him. It seems, at least as of late, that He is reconfirming His faithfulness to me... through His word, through life experiences, and through the lives of others and despite pain, heartache, and trials.

Today as I drove to town with my littlest babe screaming in the back seat (is there ever going to be an end to this?!), the song Blessings by Laura Story came on the radio. It was the first time I'd heard it, but despite the chaos of traffic around me, my little girl babbling in the back seat, or the screaming little guy sitting next to her, everything seemed to fade away as I listened intently to the lyrics. I just felt like God was very near to me at that moment and was again reconfirming His providence and faithfulness in my life.

Here are the lyrics to that beautiful song.

Blessings, by Laura Story

We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family
Protection while we sleep

We pray for healing
For prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand
to ease our suffering

And all the while
You hear each spoken need
Yet love is way too much to give us lesser things

Cuz what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know you’re near
What if trials of this life
Are Your mercies in disguise?

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness
We doubt Your love

As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
And all the while You hear each desperate plea
Lord, that we’d have faith to believe

Cuz what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know you’re near
What if trials of this life
Are Your mercies in disguise?

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not
This is not our home

Cuz what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know you’re near
What if trials of this life
Are Your mercies in disguise?

What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
is the revealing of a greater thirst
This world can’t satisfy?
And what if trials of this life
The rain
The storms
The hardest nights
are your mercies in disguise

One Year

2011-03-18T13:26:00.001-04:00

The kids are napping (or supposed to be) and familiar songs are playing on the radio. Songs from Casting Crowns' latest CD, Until the Whole World Hears, are playing on their radio. I love the fact that they listen to songs about Jesus as they drift off to sleep, but I can almost not even bear to hear those songs. I can't listen to that CD anymore.

A year ago, ending and beginning again with March 18, those same songs frequently played on the radio in my car. I had recently received the CD as a gift for Christmas and Casting Crowns was Nathan's current musical obsession. There wasn't a car ride where he was involved that we didn't listen to that CD. Many a car ride took us to the hospital, checking on the viability of our 4th pregnancy which ultimately ended in miscarriage. And I guess that is why, whenever I hear those familiar words and music notes, I have this yucky feeling inside. I just can't bear to revisit the songs or listen intently to the music.

I was talking with Luke last night about what we were doing a year ago from then. St. Patrick's Day will probably always stand as a reminder of that final ultrasound...confirming our fears, dashing our hopes, and sending us into the great valley of miscarriage. The next day was my D&C and I can remember it like it was yesterday; the feelings are very fresh.

This time last year, we were devastated once again and in shock that we had to endure this pain again. We were mourning. But not this year. This year, we are rejoicing in God's faithfulness. He has graciously given us the miracle that is Nicholas and had we not endured that struggle, we wouldn't have ever had him in our lives. I can't imagine living without his coos and his giant, gummy, open mouth grins. I can't imagine living without his belly laugh at the chicken dance or without ever smelling the fragrance of his newborn head. I can't imagine life without him. Period.

I bumped into Psalm 30 today and, while the entire passage is very fitting for the way I feel today, one year past the devastation of our 2nd miscarriage, I am specifically meditating on verse 11:

You turned my wailing into dancing;
you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy,
that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent.
LORD my God, I will praise you forever.

It's been one heck of a year... a miscarriage, a nerve-wracking pregnancy following a miscarriage, and now, the sweet goodness of God in the flesh of Nicholas David. God is so good.

Sick with a Capital "S"

2011-03-04T13:27:00.000-05:00

I sincerely hate the fact that bugs usually enter this house (probably through my beloved preschool son who picks them up at school) and go on a rampage through (just about) each member of the family before it finally leaves us alone. This happened recently with a cold; Nathan was coughing, then Luke was coughing, and then Jenna was coughing. Luke's ended up in a sinus infection and Jenna still has a lingering cough. Luckily, Nicholas and I were mostly spared, aside from a mildly stuffy nose for him first thing in the morning. Nothing that some saline and a bulb syringe can't fix!

The newest bug to attack our family has been this lovely stomach bug that seems to be going around. Nathan fell ill on Friday night and was sick on Saturday morning but mostly fine by the evening. I held my breath, crossed my fingers, and did everything possible to avoid any of us getting sick. Jenna was fine all day Tuesday, apart from being a tad bit grumpy and edgy, but almost right after dinner on Tuesday night, she started with this throwing up and diarrhea. I thought that she'd follow a similar course as Nathan, quickly recovering from the bug.

Nope.

It's Friday and the poor girl is still having issues. She threw up again this morning and has been majorly plagued with diarrhea all day long. Poor, poor thing. She randomly falls asleep, overcome with exhaustion and sickness, and is just not herself. Safe to say, I miss my bubbly little girl!

I'm on strict orders from the nurse at the Pediatrician's office about how to care for her. I'm keeping an eye on her hydration status and just trying to help her over this hump. Hopefully she'll be feeling better soon! I've been quarantined inside this house for almost an entire week and I'm slowly losing sanity. :)

Nicholas' 2-month Appointment

2011-03-03T14:09:00.000-05:00

I took my littlest boy in today for his 2-month appointment. Where does time go? I feel like I was just there and he was a few days old.

Anyhow, I was prepared for quite a few shots, though probably a little less phased by the idea of them as I was with my first or second. I mean, yes, the fact that they are going to be experiencing pain that *I* consented to makes my heart ache, but I realize now (moreso than then) that it is necessary and that life goes on.

My favorite part of these routine visits is just being able to see how big my kid is getting. I like comparing their stats to those of their siblings. Mr. Nicholas was my smallest at birth and he came through similarly today.

Weight - 12 lbs 2 ozs (66%) - up 5 lbs exactly from his birth weight
Height - 23.75 inches (81%)

He was a half a pound or more less than my first two and was also longer. I was most amused by Nathan's 2-month stats in comparison. The kid who was short and fat (12 lbs 13 ozs & 22 inches) then is still on the shorter side now, but so so skinny! Obviously these stats aren't some great indicator of what will be in the future, but I do enjoy seeing how much they've grown in actual numbers.

The boy got 3 shots and an oral vaccine. He let out this pitiful hurt cry and looked at me with his big, blue, tear stained eyes. It broke my heart all over again! I picked him up immediately after she finished with him and held him closely and nursed him for a while. He seemed better after that and fell asleep for the entire car ride home (unusual, if you know him at all).

He was a little off before naptime - fussy, clingy, and tired but not willing to stay down. He's down for a nap now and I hope he starts feeling better soon!

Play Date

2011-02-25T15:25:00.001-05:00

*Gulp*

My son is growing up way too fast. Kindergarten registration is next week and I just can't quite believe he's old enough for that already. Where has the time gone??

Until yesterday, I never really considered the possibility of play dates without both mothers present. It just never occurred to me. Play dates, at least up until this point, involved inviting a mother and her child(ren) to our house or some other location so the kids could get together. I was very comfortable with this idea of play date.

Until Nathan's friend "R" invited him over for a play date at his house. When his preschool teachers first mentioned that "R" was dying to have Nathan over, I was going over the logistics in my mind. If "R's" mother works all day, how will we all get together at night? And would it be rude to let the little two tag along? Clearly I was misinformed on big kid play dates.

*Gulp*

A big kid play date is really not at all like a little kid play date. In a big kid play date, you drop your precious-child-who-has-never-been-away-from-you-or-other-family-with-the-exception-of-church-and-school off at his friend's house to play for a few hours. Sounds good, right? Except the only thing you really know about this friend is what you have learned of him and his parents at preschool drop off and pick up. That doesn't equate to much. So we spoke with "R's" parents several times, just trying to get a feel for these people-we-don't-know-who-want-our-baby-boy-for-several-hours. They passed the initial interviews :)

So we arranged with "R's" parents a time and a date: Thursday from 5-7pm. Except Thursday came and I completely didn't remember. It was 5:15 or so when I got a call from a strange number. Immediately when she spoke, I remembered that we had plans. Oops. So Luke ran Nathan to "R's" house, about a 15 minute drive, scopes the place and people out, arranges plans for Nathan's pick up a few hours later, and came back home, where dinner had been ready for about 40 minutes.

The whole time he was gone was so very surreal. My kid had flown the coop for really the first time. He was away, off at a friend's (who did not also happen to be related) house. A million thoughts were going through my mind - mostly that I hoped he was behaving and that the mother wasn't regretting her decision to let Nathan and "R" play together.

Luke went to pick him up and, as it turns out, Nathan WAS well behaved and "R" DID want to have another play date with him. I'm thinking next time we'll arrange things so Nathan can have his friend here. Nathan came back just beaming. He had such a great time!

Yesterday was the first day in a while that I've had to let go of a little of Nathan's babyhood and let him take that next step in his childhood. Overall I think it was good for us; he got to grow a little and I got to see that he was capable of conducting himself nicely when I'm not around. But when I look out into the next few months and years, I see that I'm going to have to start letting go by more than just little bits; I'm going to have to start letting go lots. And that frightens me. That's why I'm thankful that My God (and Nathan's God too, I am reminded) is with him wherever he goes, even when I can't be. And when I can't protect him from everything or everyone or every circumstance, My God is in full control.

That doesn't make the letting go any easier, but it does make it a little less scary. And less scary is always good :)

The Story of Nicholas David

2011-02-22T13:57:00.003-05:00

I guess the story of Nicholas really began on April 22, 2010, the day I saw two pretty pink lines on the pregnancy test. I was due on January 5, 2011. Needless to say after all that had happened just prior to this pregnancy discovery, I was a bundle of nerves. But I went on to have a great pregnancy, probably my easiest of the three successful ones, and I tried my best to cherish the moments of the time I had with this little guy taking up residence in my belly.

Since I normally tend to go late term in my pregnancies (40 weeks +), I expected about the same this time around. I decided not to focus too much on a date because it gets depressing to see your due date come and go, so I decided to believe that I'd have my baby somewhere in the first half of January.

Late in the evening of December 29th, I felt a few regular contractions and thought, "Is this it?!" Having had a few bouts of regular contractions prior to this night, I decided just not to pay attention to them. If they were the real deal, they'd get stronger no matter what I did. Luke went to bed around midnight and the contractions were annoying but not horrific. From midnight until around 4am, I tossed and turned, slept when I could, but was awoken frequently by increasingly painful contractions. At about 4am, I decided to break out the birthing ball. It helped to bounce and breathe through the contractions. I did this until about 6:30am when I decided to wake Luke up and get started towards leaving for the hospital.

My biggest reasoning for waiting so long was that I wanted to be around to say goodbye to the kids before we left. So Nathan stumbled in around 6:45 and Jenna woke up shortly after that. I called my dad at around 7 and he headed over and the guys tackled breakfast for the kids while I cleaned up the house a little and packed up the kids between contractions. Luke was scurrying around, making phone calls, canceling meetings, managing the kids, and taking down the Christmas tree (YES, he was taking down the tree during labor!). It was around 7:45 when I realized that we needed to get out of there fast.

The ride to the hospital was pretty painful. The sitting position was not comfortable for me during labor, so that and the pressure of the seatbelt was becoming unbearable. Add to that the extremely bumpy roads on the final trek to the hospital during what I now know was transition, I was getting very uncomfortable.

We got to L&D at around 8:30, stopping a time or two on the way up because I couldn't walk through the contractions (which were coupling - coming right on top of each other). The L&D staff stuck me in triage to make sure I was really in labor (ha!), put me on the monitors for a bit, and checked me. The whole time I was praying that I'd be more than just a few centimeters. Imagine my shock when the nurse declared me a good 7-8 centimeters!!

My nurse got called out for another delivery and a new nurse replaced her. I met a Family Practice doctor who thought she'd be delivering my baby since there were no available OBs and all the midwives were tied up as well. She also got called away to the other delivery. A new nurse came in at around 8:45 and I started feeling pressure. She decided to check me again, thinking I could not have progressed much in so short a time, but she was shocked to discover that I really was 10cm and ready to push!

Since I was still in triage, she quickly walked me to an available room and from then on, it was a flurry of activity getting everything set up on the fly - the baby bassinet, the baby warmer, the delivery tray. All of the sudden, I knew I couldn't keep him in any longer and Luke had to go out and ask the janitor in the hall go and find someone.

The nurse and nurse's assistant came back quickly, replacing the monitors and trying to finish getting everything set up. At around 9:05-9:10, a midwife (who I had never met) came running in. She said, "Hi, my name is Deb. I'm a midwife and I'm going to be delivering your baby because there is no one else!" I came to find out after the fact that she had been taken from a c-section to help deliver me because she was the only one that could be freed up to do so. Nice....

After 3 or so good pushes, Nicholas David was born squeaking at 9:16am on December 30th. He was 7lbs 2oz (my smallest kid yet!) and 20.5 inches long. He had a head full of dark brown hair and dark tone to his skin. They placed him on my chest while they were finishing up with me and he nursed for about an hour or so laying right on my chest. Afterwards, he got taken to his little warmer in the room and the nurse did all his assessments with Luke standing by as I got up and showered. That first shower post-baby always feels so wonderful!

Later that afternoon, the big kids came and visited their new brother with Grammy and Papa. They were so excited to meet him and reacted so nicely to having a new sibling. We spent a half hour or 45 minutes with them before they headed off for dinner. Throughout the evening, we had other family come to visit. Jillian and John, and Jared and Amanda. It was so nice to see everyone and be able to show off our new little guy!

The day was a whirlwind. It was so nice to be just the three of us at the end of the day. Luke and I took turns holding him and admiring his sweet little face. It was nice to be able to get to know the baby we had dreamed about for so long.

After a rough night for Nicholas in the hospital (I won't lie, haha), we were discharged the next morning where we resumed life at home as a family of five for the first time. To this day, the big kids have never expressed jealousy or regressing. They have been proud and welcoming, extremely loving, and they seem to be taking this new change in perfect stride.

Having three kids for these last 7 weeks has been amazing for us. In fact, having these three sealed our decision to have a fourth. We look around at night when we're all together after the craziness of the day and we can't imagine how life can get any better. The amazing amount of love that we share between us is so real and so special and I'm so excited to see how it gets even better in the days to come.

Bottled Up Baby

2011-02-11T13:44:00.001-05:00

The sense of smell, at least for me, has the ability to bring back some of my strongest memories.

For example, when I smell Bath and Body Works' Cherry Blossom products, I think of being in the hospital with my new babies, since that is the scent of the stuff I've always packed in my hospital bag. I can smell Este Lauder's Cinnabar and immediately be brought back to my grandmother, who has been gone for many years now. The smell of Snickerdoodle cookies reminds me of baking with my mom as a little girl, using the red and white checked Betty Crocker cookbook for kids.

I could go on and on... some smells bring back insanely fond memories and others, well, not so much. But I'm always amazed at how the sense of smell brings me back instantaneously in a way that no other sense really can.

One of the best smells ever, though, is the smell of a newborn baby. And I'm totally realizing that Nicholas has the most wonderfully smelling head of any baby I've ever encountered. It sounds totally crazy and, I don't know, maybe it is. But when I get a whiff of that beautiful smell, my heart becomes so filled with love and fondness for my newest babe that I could literally burst at the seams.

I was sitting with him the other night in the dark and quietness of our house and I was just taking him all in. I turned to Luke and said, "I wish I could bottle up this smell and save it for 20 years down the road when I've forgotten what it he once smelled like." The boy is 6 weeks old already and, if time ever flew quickly for the other two kids, time is absolutely zipping by with him. I was just looking at him, trying to accept the fact that one day I am going to blink and he'll be all grown up. As I sat, I traced all of his features and tried to embed them somewhere deep in my mind.

I want to remember all of this, even down to the sweet smelling scent of his precious newborn head.

Jenna's 2nd Birthday

2011-02-03T13:43:00.000-05:00

So, Jenna girl's 2nd birthday was in mid-December. Prior to the big day, I had gone out shopping for the perfect birthday outfit for a perfect birthday princess. I fell in love with the corduroy polka dot skirt and matching shirt (and accessories) from Gymboree. And as pretty as it was on the hanger, it was so much adorable when we put it on her!

We passed the day doing special things with our special birthday girl. We had a special birthday breakfast at home. I made chocolate chip pancakes and bacon (of which she hardly touched, ha ha). We all loaded up and went to Chuck E Cheese for some fun play time, where Papa joined us for a little bit. For lunch, we all went out to a local mexican restaurant, one of her favorites, and had a fun lunch with both Grammy and Papa (actually, if you must know the truth, both kids were pretty well unhappy at this point, but we survived!). After lunch, we headed home for a nice, long nap to prepare for the birthday festivities that lied ahead.

Upon her request, we threw her a Curious George birthday party. When she woke up from her nap, I had the house decorated in style. Red, yellow, and blue streamers hung like a canopy over the dining room table. The table itself, stretched wide to accommodate our growing family (in fact, every member from my side), was decked out with a Curious George table cloth, red, yellow, and blue tableware, and balloons, which were attached to a brand new Curious George stuffed animal. The place looked amazing!

For dinner, I had made homemade spaghetti and meatballs, caesar salad, and cheesy Texas Toast. The meal was fit for a queen! We all ate to our stomachs' content and then, amidst the chaos of 13 people in our small house, headed into the living room for presents.

The girl was overloaded with generous gifts. Bitty Baby and a new stroller, a brand new play kitchen, a cash register, and a few gorgeous new outfits were amongst the gifts she received. Following our tradition, I also gave her another special book, which I spent hours at the bookstore trying to pick out for her. Inside, I wrote a special letter to my birthday girl, one that I hope she'll look back at many years from now and smile at how much her mama loved her.

At that point, it was bedlam :) The 4 older kids were crazy playing with each new toy, were in and out of boxes, and the adults were attempting to control the chaos. We all sang "Happy Birthday" with the lights turned out and the birthday girl blew out her big candle. The gorgeous Curious George cake was a hit - decorated fancily with beautiful flowers - was chocolate with white whipped cream icing. It was delicious!

Not long after, the party was winding down and everyone was saying goodbye. It had been a fun night, but one with lots of chaos and excitement. Jenna girl was tired and when I went to lay down with her, she would only cry in my arms. Feeling a bit frazzled myself, I went out to Luke and asked him to go in and fix it. :) And that's just what he did. After singing her a few songs, praying with her, and just snuggling for a minute, she was crying and ready for sleep. I went in shortly after, at my husband's prompting, because I was feeling sad about how the day had ended. She wrapped her little arms around me and gave me the hugest hug. I am blessed to have ended the day on that sweet note.

At the end of the day, I just couldn't believe my little girl was 2. It seemed like yesterday that we were holding her and getting to meet her for the first time. We are so blessed to have Jenna as part of our family... what would life be like without her?!

Tap, Tap

2011-02-02T14:35:00.002-05:00

*Is this thing on?!*

I stumbled across my own blog today (if that is at all possible) and noted the date of my last entry.

July 25, 2010...hmm....

So much has happened since then.

We've got ourselves a new two year old.
We've got ourselves a new baby.
We are gearing up for Kindergarten registration (yikes!)

There is so much I want to post about. And I will. Here's my list of stuff that I'm behind posting on. I'll attach links to this list once the posts are up!

Jenna's 2nd Birthday
Christmas Day
The birth of our third child, Nicholas David
Nicholas' first smile...today!

I promise that all of my posts won't be as boring as today's. I've spent some time fiddling around with the design here...it needed a bit of a freshening up. Now that we have a new look, hopefully I can start faithfully writing again. I miss it!

Until then, enjoy the few new pictures of the kiddos. I'm sure there'll be more to come!

Happy 4th Birthday, Nathan!

2010-07-25T21:15:00.000-04:00

Dearest Nathan,

Four years old and I can't even imagine where the time went. Last night as I was remembering the night you were born, I was reliving each moment in my head...I remember it all perfectly. The night you were born (or rather, early morning) was one of the best nights of my life. Seeing your adorable button nose, your pouty lips, and your beautiful face was a wonderful reward for nine long months and more than 27 hours of labor. That night, I couldn't go to sleep; I just wanted to stare at you and soak you in. You were my long-awaited miracle. You were my first baby.

We've been through lots together within the last year. Your first day of preschool and the year that followed, your first stitches, the first time you wrote your name... all those things stand out to me as huge milestones for you. You have taken every opportunity you've been given and have mastered them and have grown in leaps and bounds. You are smart and witty, you have a great sense of humor, a super funny laugh, and the most adorable smile ever. Much more importantly than the boy you are on the outside, you are a beautiful boy on the inside. You tell us often that the most important thing is to love Jesus. I love the way you love God wholeheartedly and without doubt or reservation. You encourage my faith!

The next year ahead will bring lots of new changes and milestones, just as the last did. You'll be going to a new preschool, going three days a week for more time each day. You'll spread those wings just a little bit further and I know that you'll take each opportunity and soar. You'll also help us welcome your second sibling in January and, as you've already proved, I know you'll be an excellent big brother to that baby. I can't wait to see how helpful you'll be this time around as a FOUR-YEAR-OLD!

Nathan Taylor, your daddy and I love you so much. We often look at each other and just shake our heads, simply in awe of who you are and the things you do and say. You amaze us every day and never in our wildest dreams could we have dreamed up a son as wonderful as you. You are a blessing to us and to everyone around you!

Thank you for a wonderful year, my boy. I look forward to many, many more years with you as my boy and me as your mama. I can't wait to see the boy you become!

I love you, birthday boy.

Love,

Mommy

Happy Mother's Day!

2010-05-09T20:38:00.001-04:00

Happy Mother's Day to all the important ladies in my life. I am who I am because of the roll many of you have played in my life and I am forever grateful.

Mother's Day is great and all, it really is. I have been showered with gifts, taken to lunch, given the opportunity to take a looooonnnnngggg and relaxing nap, and showered with love and affection from my two babes and their daddy. I know I am loved; I definitely feel the love emanating from from my sweet family.

BUT...

All I keep thinking about today is the man that has worked behind the scenes so that my kids, who didn't really know it was Mother's Day in the first place, could shower me with love and gifts. That man is the one who provides for us and paves the way so that I can be the mother I want to be for my children. Without that man, what I do would be completely impossible and utterly useless.

That man is my wonderful husband.

This guy deserves a raise, for sure! On top of being a wonderful provider, an amazing worker, and an all-around fun kind of guy, he is an excellent father, a nurturing husband, and a thoughtful friend.

He makes everything worthwhile. He's no mother, that's for darn sure, but he is the resource that gives me the ability to do what I love to do. I can't imagine doing this parenthood thing with anyone else.

Zoo Pictures

2010-05-03T14:42:00.000-04:00

We went on a little family trip to a nearby zoo this weekend and had a blast - just the 4 of us! Luke took so many wonderful pictures and I thought I'd share my favorites here. Enjoy!

Catch Up

2010-05-01T20:12:00.001-04:00

Wow, it's been a while. I have dropped completely out of the blogosphere. No worries though. We've been enjoying nice weather and, as always, keeping ourselves very busy with life.

Updates, updates, updates....

Jenna:

She had her 15 month appointment at 16 months exactly because of other scheduling conflicts. She is a whopping 22lbs 6ozs (32th %ile) and 31 inches (49th %ile). She's obviously very healthy and is leveling out on the growth charts.
The girl is a parrot. I could list everything she says, but that would be just about everything imaginable. My most favorite things are marshmallow and lotion, both pronounced ma-MARSH! The inflection in her voice is hysterical.
Her two top eye teeth broke through in April and a new bottom (left) eye tooth is popping through as ~~we speak~~ I write.
The girl is a drama queen to the greatest extent. She's a fusser, a whiner, and a general thrower-of-tantrums. Love her to pieces, but she really knows how to push buttons! (isn't it a bit early for this?!)
Aside from the drama she brings to the table, she is also the sweetest, cuddliest girl ever. She is genuinely caring and nurturing - cracks up when others are laughing, cries when others are crying, and comforts those who are down.

Nathan:

The boy wants to be a fireman when he grows up, so he is obsessed with ALL things fireman. He says he's going to ask our neighbor (a volunteer fireman) if he can go with him to the station one day. This kid is not afraid of anything.
HE CAN WRITE HIS OWN NAME! About a month ago or so, he said, "Mommy, look! I can write an N!" He's known how to write the rest of the letters in his name for a while, so I helped him put them all together. I can't believe he's this big!
He is the sweetest thing in the world - constantly saying I love you, coming over for an unprompted hug or kiss, and just being more snuggly in general.
My favorite thing he said to me this week was, "Mom, for Mother's Day, I am going to go out and find you a nice yellow flower and you are going to stay home and relax and take a hot bath."

So, the kids are good. And you know when the kids are good that mama is good. I am so good and so blessed with the little family that God has given me.

Feeling Sentimental

2010-04-16T21:47:00.000-04:00

It's been a long month. Too much has gone on to really summarize, but I plan on trying to do that in another post sometime.

This time, I just need to gush about my sweet, sweet son. A mere 3 1/2 years old and yet, he completely captivates my heart. He is growing up before my very eyes, getting smarter, taller, and becoming capable of giving more and more love. It's no longer the constant outpouring of love on behalf of the parents to the child that characterizes the parenting of an infant or small toddler; this is a new kind of love - a mutual give and take. I am loving this new found relationship.

Today, Nathan asked me why I wasn't a nurse anymore and I had the opportunity to explain to him that, while I am still a nurse, that I made a choice to stay home with he and his sister (and any others that might come along) while they are young. I told him that I love being a nurse but that I love being able to stay at home with him and spend that time with him. I told him that we were blessed to have a daddy who works so hard so that I don't have to go to work. He was captivated, I mean really interested. At the end of it all, he said, "Mom, I love you." ::melt::

I put him to bed tonight after a little date night. Luke is out of town this weekend, so I told Nathan that we'd do something special after his sister went to bed. We decided to watch Toy Story 2 in my bed and he asked if I could make cheesy popcorn (it's my weakness, for sure...sooooo good!) and if he could have his very own can of Sprite. We snuggled in to watch the movie together and at about half way through, he got tired. The kid asked if he could go to sleep. I never, ever turn ignore this extremely rare happening; when it happens, we act immediately. So I snuggled him into his bed and he reminded me that he wanted to sleep with me in my bed while his daddy was away. I told him I'd try to bring him into bed with me after he fell asleep in his own and then snuggled him tight in his covers and kissed him goodnight.

I came back to my bedroom and was just completely struck by what I saw. His papa, who just returned from India, had given him five $1 bills. He'd been fumbling around with them all evening - counting them, making plans of showing them to daddy and then depositing them into his piggy bank (because he wanted them to be "someplace tight"), and then keeping them close on his daddy's night stand while we watched our movie.

Anyway, I walked in and melted at the five crumpled up bills and the hardly drunk can of Sprite. I don't really know what did it for me. In fact, I keep glancing over at the dollar bills laying on the night stand and it just makes my heart leap. The way he handled them was just so sweet, I guess. He really valued them; they were important to him. They were from his papa.

My heart is just filled with such love for that boy. Well, both kids; we all know that. But tonight, I just couldn't soak him up enough. When he snuggles with me, or wants to protect me by sleeping in my bed in his daddy's place, or when he whispers "I love you" while looking deep into my eyes, I just realize that I am the most blessed woman in the entire world.

He calls me mommy and there is no greater calling than that.

Recovering

2010-03-19T08:27:00.001-04:00

We got in yesterday after the procedure with newly lifted spirits. I came home to my beautiful children who were happy to see me, gave me big hugs, and went on and on about their amazing day.

As a side note - I really am so thankful to have parents that are such wonderful grandparents. It is so amazing for me to be able to leave things entirely in their hands when I really need to and know that everything is going to be ok. Amazing.

Anyway, we came in to find sweet Nathan in his Superman cape and to find our precious Jenna singing "Happy Birthday to you," a song I swear she didn't know before I left. I hugged them tightly, taking in deep breaths of their sweet baby smells and just thanking God for the miracles in those two lives. What precious gifts from God. We are so blessed.

We are recovering. God's grace has been so abundant and the road, however difficult it has been, has been filled with reminders of God's love at just the right time. I just love Hebrews 4:15 and while I am usually an NIV kind of girl, I really love how the KJV phrases this verse.

For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.

Today, I am thankful for a Savior who has walked this road in similar circumstances before me and can sympathize with my situation.

I've heard this song on the radio many times and it has spoken to me, but it speaks new meaning to me as of late and I thought I'd share it.

Unredeemed - by Selah

The cruelest world
The coldest heart
The deepest wound
The endless dark
The lonely ache
The burning tears
The bitter nights
The wasted years

Life breaks and falls apart
But we know these are
Places where grace is soon to be so amazing
It may be unfulfilled
It may be unrestored
But when anything that's shattered is laid before the Lord
Just watch and see
It will not be unredeemed

For every choice that led to shame
And all the love that never came
For every vow that someone broke
And every lie that gave up hope
We live in the shadow of the fall
But the cross says these are all
Places where grace is soon to be so amazing
It may be unfulfilled
It may be unrestored
But when anything that's shattered is laid before the Lord
Just watch and see
It will not be unredeemed

Places where grace is soon to be so amazing
It may be unfulfilled
It may be unrestored
But you never know the miracle the Father has in store
Just watch and see
It will not be
Just watch and see
It will not be unredeemed

There Will Be a Day

2010-03-17T18:25:00.000-04:00

In the wake of a second painful loss, I am thankful that there will be a day with "no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears."

There Will Be A Day, by Jeremy Camp

I try to hold on to this world with everything I have
But I feel the weight of what it brings, and the hurt that tries to grab
The many trials that seem to never end, His word declares this truth,
that we will enter in this rest with wonders anew

But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more
fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more,
we'll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we'll hold on to you always

I know the journey seems so long
You feel you’re walking on your own
But there has never been a step
Where you’ve walked out all alone

Troubled soul don’t lose your heart
Cause joy and peace he brings
And the beauty that’s in store
Outweighs the hurt of life’s sting

But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more
fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more,
we'll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we'll hold on to you always

I can’t wait until that day where the very one I’ve lived for always will
wipe away the sorrow that I’ve faced
To touch the scars that rescued me from a life of shame and misery
this is why this is why I sing

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more
fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more,
we'll see Jesus face to face

There will be a day, he will wipe away the tears,
He will wipe away the tears,
He will wipe away the tears,
There will be a day.

"Bath"tizing

2010-03-15T21:01:00.000-04:00

I laugh sometimes (well, all the time), watching my kids interact with each other because when I look very closely, I see my siblings and me. It cracks me up to see them loving and fighting and playing the same way I used to with my brother and sister when we were children.

One thing that we used to do a lot as children was "bath"tizing. I guess it's because we were PKs (pastor's kids), but we loved to use bath time for dunking each other in God's name. We always fought over who would actually be the "bath"tizER and who would be the "bath"tizEE. So funny.

Lately, Mr. Nathan is full of questions about baptizing and heaven and is just curious about Jesus in general. I love to hear him profess his faith in Jesus, however small and not completely conceived it is and I love to hear him talk about when we will all be in heaven. Oh, how I'd love to have the simple faith of a child!

But the funniest thing that has come out of this talk has been "bath"tizing. And, I swear that I didn't ever tell him about what I did as a child, nor did I tell him that we called it "bath"tizing in the first place. He loves to "bath"tize his sister, much to her dismay, and is just dying for her to be old enough to really play back.

I guess my favorite part of having two kids is just watching them be together, whether they are antagonizing one another or are voluntarily hugging and kissing. What could be better than this?!

Urine So Much Trouble!

2010-03-05T21:43:00.001-05:00

Ugh.

I don't even want to share the story because of the Ewwww Factor, but the husband hath declared that I shall share...if only for the benefit of having the story in writing for years to come.

::Ahem::

My daughter, you know she's a feisty one. She's fast on her feet and she knows what she wants. Her little feet can take her anywhere she wants to go but her sweet, developing brain cannot yet see the implications of her actions. It's not a great combination.

Anyway, I was getting ready to put the kids down for a nap today and was in the living room with an armful of everything that does not belong in the living room. It was quite a big load. I had just finished telling Nathan to go to the bathroom and then head for his room and I was half listening to make sure he was following my instructions. I heard him open the door to my room, go through the door to the bathroom, and do his business. The next thing I knew, he was back in his room but I didn't hear the toilet flush. I didn't hear the bathroom door close.

Uh oh.

Jenna is a bathroom dweller. Her favorite past time while I am getting ready in the morning is to hang out in the bathtub, fully clothed, playing with toys and the cat. Yes, I know. Weird combination. And yes, the cat does play in the tub.

So I ~~ran into the bathroom~~ walked as fast as I could toward the bathroom, as fast as one can while juggling a load of stuff, and dumped the load onto my bed as I passed by. I approached the bathroom and beheld my sweet cherub, standing at the porcelain throne, elbow deep in water. And other stuff.

Immediately, I lunged toward the girl, hoping to free her entire person from being coated in toilet matter (which remember, contained a little deposit from her brother, which I might add was only his urine, and his unflushing ways) and was witness to the most awful, disgusting, horrific happening.

She lifted a cup (that had been unseen up to this point) out from deep beneath the toilet matter and drank from it.

Ewwww!! Gross!! Disgusting!!

I was so completely horrified that I swooped in, batted the cup out of her hands, and removed her from her throne. I took a good look at her and discovered that, not only had she drank the toilet matter, it was everywhere. All over her clothes, down to her socks, and of course all over her person.

Still horrified, I carried her into her bedroom and laid her on the changing table. There was not enough scrubbing to be done to rid her from the awfulness she had just encountered. I removed her clothes with only the tips of my fingers (so as not to transfer the toilet matter from her to me), gagging all the way, and got her all clothed up for a nap. Meanwhile, I called to Nathan in my rage and told him that 1) He must ALWAYS flush the toilet from now on and 2) He must ALWAYS close the bathroom door after he finishes in there!

I'm still quite disgusted by the story. Seriously, it makes me sick to think about what she did today. Knowing that I can't always be right on top of her every.single.moment, I'm wondering what she'll find to get into next.

Ugh.

Rosy Cheeks

2010-02-23T14:43:00.000-05:00

When I was a little girl, I can remember watching my mom do her makeup every morning (what little she wore). I seem to remember her wearing blush and mascara every day. I'd watch in amazement as she carefully applied her makeup and dream of the day when I'd be doing it, too.

When I got a little bit older, she'd turn to me and say, "Would you like some rosy cheeks?" Boy, was it ever the highlight of my day to experience the privilege of having rosy cheeks!

So here I am today, a full-fledged mother of my own. I have my own daily routine, which also includes applying my makeup. I recently looked down and noticed the bright eyes of my own beautiful little girl, quietly and inquisitively looking on and admiring my work.

One recent morning, I turned to her and said, "Would you like some rosy cheeks?" and she looked sort of baffled. Then I took my blush brush and stroked her soft, chubby cheeks with a small touch of color and told her all about rosy cheeks.

To this day, even weeks later, she comes in to watch me putting on my makeup. If she's there, she says longingly, "Cheeks! Cheeks!!! Please!" And I bend down and give her what she asks for the same way that my mother did me.

And other times, she'll be busy doing whatever it is babies do in the living room (you know, like torturing her brother, destroying the furniture, or tormenting the cat...) and I'll call out, "Jenna! Would you like some rosy cheeks?" and my baby will come running as fast as she can, shouting, "Cheeks! Cheeeeeeeks!" all the way to my room.

And that is the story of Rosy Cheeks.

Sweet Nothings

2010-02-16T14:45:00.000-05:00

Nathan has been so sweet lately. He comes up with the sweetest things to tell me and I just had to record his latest babblings.

We were in the car yesterday on the way to town and I could just feel his little eyes watching me as I drove. I like to imagine what he was thinking about before he came up with these sweet words after a long break of silence.

Nathan: "Mommy, you look very pretty today."
Me: "Aww, thank you Nathan! That was a very sweet thing to say!"
Nathan: "Sometimes I just forget."
Me: "Forget what, sweetie?"
Nathan: "Forget to tell you that you're beautiful."

I was driving around just feeling so much pride and love for that little guy that I came close to crying! My eyes welled for for a second, for sure! Sometimes he is SO sweet and SO loving that my heart just melts and can barely stand it. I love him so much and am really enjoying each day with him as it comes. We've really got something quite special here.

Angels Unaware

2010-02-10T21:53:00.001-05:00

Have you ever had one of those moments where you were in a situation where something bad was about to happen and you were miraculously and inexplicably saved? I know that I have at least a few stories to prove this point. After the fact, you wonder to yourself how on earth you made it out alive, let alone unharmed. In those circumstances, I don't believe that it was some act of fate or destiny that prevented a very bad situation; I believe it was God. I believe that God sends His angels to work in the midst of those seemingly impossible circumstances and sends them to do the unthinkable in order to spare His children from severe harm and danger.

My mom was in an accident today which could have ended up so badly - she could have even been killed. The circumstances of this accident sound so bizarre and most would attribute her good outcome to luck or fate, but I know that God protected her in a completely unthinkable way and spared her life. I am so thankful to God today for the way that He protected my mom. I truly believe with all of my heart that He sent angels that orchestrated the series of events that eventually lead to her safety. Praise God for His constant presence and His hand of protection.

I like to think that one day when we get to Heaven, God will play back for us all of these situations - many that we were unaware even existed - and we will see how God intervened for us. As if we won't have enough reason to praise God when we come into His presence, but when He shows us more of His awesome power, we will be truly amazed!

Wordless Wednesday

2010-02-03T13:20:00.000-05:00

::sigh:: I'm smitten with this boy.

So Long, Farewell

2010-01-26T22:40:00.000-05:00

~~auf Wiedersehen~~ you know, all that German stuff, goodbye.

We are leaving for a vacation to visit Luke's folks tomorrow morning and will be gone an entire week! I'm excited to get out of this place for a while and hopefully be able to relax a bit, although I'd feel better about leaving if I knew it would be super warm where we're headed (which it's not). In any case, I'm looking forward to getting away. It'll be Jenna's first airplane ride, so this should make for one wild ride.

Hopefully I'll return with pictures...but maybe not because you know how bad I am at posting pictures where the actually pertain to the happenings of our lives.

So long, farewell!

Three and a Half

2010-01-25T20:54:00.000-05:00

This is the essence of the boy. He is spunky, adventurous, witty, smart, and an overall fun kid to be around. The difficulty that was the terrible-twos and the subsequent months has seemed to have faded and our family has been left with a little boy who lights up our world.

Many times after the boy has finally closed his eyes and gone to bed, we sit up in bed just beaming with love for him. Occasionally one of us will break out with a story that we remembered or just a cute thing he said that day and we just gush with pride and the joy that is having him in our lives. It surely doesn't get much better than this.

He's moving into that fun-to-be-with-even-though-you're-my-kid phase and we have the best of times. I love being around him, doing fun things with him, and listening to him talk and talk and talk. I usually can't wait to hear the next thing he comes up with.

Today, he presented his father with a tiny toy trophy as he came up from the office for dinner. He thrust the trophy in Luke's face and said, "Here's a trophy for ya, daddy, for a nice work." The look on Luke's face was priceless!

Three and a half. Where did the time go?

A Stitch in Time

2010-01-22T14:40:00.000-05:00

Yikes...what a morning! Luke so kindly offered to get up with the children so I could have a little extra sleep. I was blissfully sleeping away into the mid-morning hours when I hear frantic yells from the dining room.

"ALISON. Babe! Al, WAKE UP! I need HELP!"

There's nothing else, other than probably the screams of your own child, that can get you out of bed sooner than a distressed cry for help.

My boy had slipped off of a dining room chair and landed into another, gashing his forehead. When I finally ~~ran like a madwoman~~ made my way to where they were, all I could see was blood everywhere - Luke's shirt, Nathan's shirt, Nathan's head. It was an awful mess. When Luke lifted the towel so I could see what was underneath, I was immediately sickened and shocked to find that horrific gash in my, up-until-that-moment unscarred, sweet boy's head. It was just awful.

So, we rushed around, calling the doctor, throwing on clothes, and hopping in the car, racing to the Emergency Room.

Nathan was an absolute champ. Once the initial bout of crying was done, he really didn't do more than fuss until the time the stitches were placed. The ER staff numbed up a good portion of his forehead (well encompassing the wound itself) with a numbing cream and after a good half hour, they were ready to proceed. They numbed up the area with lidocaine and got to work.

This is the part that really breaks my heart. There's nothing worse for a parent than to see your sweet baby lying on a table just screaming and crying in pain and fright. Luke and I sat right next to him as they were placing the stitches. We sang, we talked, we tried doing anything that would calm him down. He cried, saying that it was burning and that he was afraid. It was awful.

But 4 stitches later, he was all sewn up. The wound looked clean and well-approximated (how's that for a fancy word?!) and I think it will heal nicely. Nathan instantly felt better once they were done and moved on to his treats.

The staff brought him chocolate ice cream and a stuffed bull dog (to add to the panda bear that papa returned with from the gift shop) as a reward for brave behavior. We took him for mexican food at his request after we were discharged.

All's well that ends well and he seems to be fine. I just hate that he ever had to be hurt in the first place. My parents always used to say things to the effect of, "if I could trade places with you..." and I always believed them, but never actually realized how much they really did mean it. I would have given anything to be the one in pain, laying on that table being sewn up. I really would have.

So, Superman is recovering nicely. Let's hope there is minimal scarring after this is all said and done.

Daddy's Girl

2010-01-19T14:20:00.001-05:00

These two have a special relationship - one that neither has ever encountered before and one that has been acquired through persistence, tenderness, and abounding love.

On this day, our sweet Jenna girl was sick. She took a longer-than-usual nap - 3.5 hours! - and woke up still very sleepy and quiet. I had some things to do around the house, so I handed her over to her daddy and she snuggled right in. It must have been at least an hour that she dozed in his arms and laid quietly on his chest, something that she rarely does with either one of it. I don't think her daddy has ever been so proud and has ever had his heart so warmed by her as he did that day on the couch. He closed his computer, put away the work he was doing, and snuggled in.

I love to see the relationship between these two grow and change. It is definitely different than the one he shares with Nathan and I love to see how tender and sweet he is with his girls. I think she has him wrapped around her little finger.

Trimming the Locks

2010-01-16T13:55:00.002-05:00

Remember this newborn baby?

You know, the one with the most hair I'd ever seen?

Well, that little princess, just 13 months ago, started out with a head full of hair and never lost a strand. Really, she never lost any hair. In fact, it kept growing, and growing, and growing. Kinda like Rapunzel in the story of the girl with long, golden hair. See?

It's been getting a little, well, pitiful in the back - staticy, scraggly, and thin. So, much to her daddy's dismay, we took her today to ~~cut her beautiful hair~~ trim the ends of her hair and add a few layers to blend in her current jagged layers and give it a little boost. We went to town, ~~cutting~~ trimming away with her on my lap.

And then we dried it with the blow dryer for the first time ever. She looks a little scared, no?

Ta-da! All done and ready to go!

A big girl with a big girl haircut!

Magical

2010-01-08T15:26:00.003-05:00

I can remember being very nervous upon finding out I was pregnant with our second child. I always seemed to move back and forth between super excited and ready to take on the world to a feeling of overwhelming "what-have-we-gotten-ourselves-into?" And then she arrived and with that first cry, in that first moment of holding her tightly against my chest, and in their first meeting, I knew we had done the right thing. Miss Jenna-girl came into our lives with so little hassle, so little fuss and from her first day home, it has seemed like she's always been here.

I remember Nathan when we brought her home, wanting to run around with her and wondering why she just laid there all the time. I kept telling him to be patient, that soon she'd be coming after him and she'd be getting into his things and he'd wonder why he ever wished for her to chase him in the first place. We're to that point now and have never had so much fun in our lives. I sat in my room for a few minutes this afternoon just listening to the two kids play and laugh together in Jenna's room after she woke up from her nap. There just is no sound more precious than that!

The time we're living in these days is magical. From the magic of the girl's first steps to the magic of the boy's first days in preschool. For each new word, new tooth, new skill, new pair of shoes, we are living days that are constantly full of surprises and the wonderment of childhood. For each hug they share, argument they have (yes, we already have those, too!), and laugh and cackle between the slats of the crib, I am learning more and more to savor these moments; they are fleeting. And I am realizing more and more how blessed they are to have each other and how very blessed I am to have both of them.

Magical!

Generosity

2010-01-03T21:11:00.002-05:00

I have been so struck by the generosity of our community in the last week. The story is long and has many details, but suffice it to say that my husband described a need that he knew of in the community, not really to urge anyone to help meet the need but rather to share a story that really saddened his heart, and the community in which we lived really rose to the occasion.

Coming together in this massive, far-reaching arm of support, our community members cared enough to donate over $400 and their time to give a Christmas to a little boy in our community who had been forgotten by his adoptive Santa.

Tonight, my husband and I took our two small children, packed them up in the car this afternoon in 14 degree weather, and drove them around town. On the way there, we talked about why we were going and we tried to drive home the message of giving, hoping to get them excited about having a generous spirit. We were so excited as we picked out games and clothes for this little boy, often going back and forth about the perfect shirt or the best game to buy. It was so much fun to be able to go out and buy the gifts, thinking of the end result of a little boy so excited by this unexpected surprise. I really wish I had been able to deliver them in person with Luke because I would have loved to have seen the look on the little boy's face when he realized that this was all done for him.

I just keep thinking, THIS is what Christmas is all about. When I think about my own life, there isn't much that I even needed for Christmas, but this kid didn't have a single thing to open, not a single gift to unwrap. I feel so much happier in the giving than I did in the receiving and I know that this is a joy that will last me for a long time and I know for certain that this is a Christmas that the little boy will never forget.

I am just so thankful to be a member of a community that really cares enough to reach out to meet a need and to be excited about doing so. What a blessing.

Praise God from Whom all blessings flow!

One Year Molar, Take Three

2009-12-30T14:56:00.000-05:00

I know this is boring stuff for an outside reader, but since this blog was conceived as a way to document the important milestones of my kids, I figure I should just slip this one in.

Jenna's third molar, her bottom left, broke through her gums yesterday! Perhaps this is what has contributed to a slightly-more-fussy, majorly-drooly, and ear-infectioned little girl. The antibiotics seems to be helping my girl, who was the very blessed recipient of a double ear infection, and she seems to be on the mend. Hooray for that!

A Time to Love

2009-12-25T20:50:00.003-05:00

Christmas is a time to love and my family was sure to do just that today. We were showered with many gifts, including the gift of sweet fellowship as our family gathered together today. But it wasn't really all about the gifts.

Today, we celebrated the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, who came into this world more than 2000 years ago to be born as a baby, live a perfect life on this earth, and to die for our sins, redeeming us and preventing us from living in eternal separation from God. What an occasion for celebration!

From our family to yours, Merry Christmas. May our lights shine brighter for Him in 2010 than ever before.

Oh Molars, Where Art Thou?

2009-12-22T21:45:00.000-05:00

Jenna's gums have been so terribly swollen. In the last month or so, I have noticed that the top and bottom gums have just absolutely swollen solid and have chalked much of her irritation (as infrequent as it may be) to teething. Her irritation has escalated in the last week or two, with her waking at night on an occasion (which is odd for her), biting on everything (including me!) and drooling buckets. Tonight, she finally let me get a finger in there and, though I did get bitten quite hard a few times, I made two very exciting discoveries.

Jenna's top two molars have broken through the gums!!

When I felt along her bottom gums, I could feel the rigidity of the teeth below the surface of the gums, but no actual teeth yet. It should be any day now, I would assume.

2 molars down, 2 to go until the 2 year molars. Now I imagine we'll start working on the canines. Fun, fun! I forgot how much of a pain teething was (and I can only imagine what it's like from the baby's point of view).

Funnies

2009-12-17T22:13:00.001-05:00

Here are just a few, random, cute pics of the kids. I love these guys!

Twelve Month Stats

2009-12-16T14:16:00.001-05:00

I took my newest one-year-old to the doctor for her twelve-month checkup today. Though I hate the shots (she got 3!!) and the blood work (which we have postponed a bit), I do like to see how much the kids have grown. Here are her official twelve-month stats:

Height - 29 1/2 inches (57%) - up an inch from 9 months.
Weight - 20lbs 7ozs (35%) - up 1lb 1oz from 9 months.

She is definitely leveling off as far as her weight is concerned. Of course, the doctor was not concerned about this...she could never have continued to grow at that prior pace or she would be huge! Besides, her brother once owned the weight chart as well, until around 9 months when he started the decline and then eventually fell to the bottom of the curve (in the less than 3rd percentile). So, she is very healthy.

He was amazed at her verbal and social skills, saying that she was the most social one-year-old he's seen in a while

Here is a list of what she can say these days:

mama, dada, nay-nay -- nay-nay is obviously Nathan.
baba -- Papa
hi
bye-bye -- complete with wave
all done -- complete with sign
thank you
yes & no -- wanna guess which comes more often?
baby -- usually said with a hug and a kiss (to the phone, to her doll, to her cousin)
eyes -- and she knows where they are!
booper -- this is her belly button; she loves to play with it.
hot -- said with a little upward inflection. She, of course, thinks all drinks are hot.
hat
balloon - "boon"
ball
boo -- playing "peek a boo"
dog -- and she knows what it says, "woof!"

So she's coming right along. She is getting so big and so brave. She has started taking unprompted steps on her own, but I think she'd prefer to crawl so that she can keep up with Nathan. One day soon, I think she'll take off and never look back.

I'm really enjoying this age! Really, the ages of my two kids (3 and 1) are really working for me right now. They love each other so much and it's really fun to see them interact more and more.

One Year Old

2009-12-14T22:32:00.001-05:00

My Dearest Jenna, darling,

Today is your first birthday and I have had many mixed emotions as this day has approached us. Mostly, I have found myself happily welcoming this day, excited for not only the day itself but the days that follow it. But last night, I broke down as my gaze caught the picture of you as a tiny baby at Easter on my armoire. I looked at that tiny baby in the sweetest picture that has probably ever been taken of you and couldn't believe that an entire year had passed and that you, who were once my tiny baby, had blossomed into this vibrant and beautiful little girl, still a baby in part, but already such a big girl.

We have had a great day together as a family. After realizing that the Discovery Center was closed, we took you and your brother for a quick trip to Chuck E. Cheese. Since you have always been there as a small baby, this was the first time you ever had the opportunity to ride some of the rides on your own. You loved them all, especially the school bus and the car with Chuck E. Cheese. Then we went to have lunch with Grammy and Papa. You love them so much and they were delighted to show their birthday girl off.

But I think the highlight for all of us was the small party at home tonight. I decorated the house with streamers and balloons, signs and table cloths; it looked so beautiful. When our family arrived, you were so genuinely excited to see each one of them. Grammy and Papa, Uncle John, AJ, Brooke, and Adrienne, and Frunkle and Auntie were all in attendance and they showered you with love and special gifts.

My favorite part was watching you eat your cake. I gave you a pretty decent slice of the beautifully decorated cake and you daintily poked around through it until I gave you a fork. You took that fork like an old pro and dove right in, feeding yourself and offering bites to those around you. I couldn't believe that you ate almost all of it, though I guess I shouldn't be surprised!

I spent a few extra moments with you as I put you to bed tonight. I held you close (as you held your new Baby Stella close) and sang you the song that Daddy and I sung you a few moments after you were born, "Welcome to the Family." As I sung, your eyes sleepily gazed into mine and I looked deep into yours and just told you how much I loved you and how much your life has changed mine for the better. You were most certainly a welcome addition.

It was a beautiful day and we spent it all enjoying you and celebrating your life. This time last year, I couldn't imagine what life would look life when you entered into it. Now, I can't imagine living this life without you in it. You entered our lives so gracefully and it was as if you had always been here. We have spent the entire last year watching you grow from a helpless baby girl to a more independent, spunky little girl. It has been such a fun ride.

Jenna, if you remember nothing else, I want you to remember this: that I love you so much more than you could ever imagine. We have so much to look forward as you continue to grow and I can't wait to see what the next year holds. I know that this year will also pass with the snap of a finger, so I promise you that I will cherish every moment and applaud every milestone met. We are going to have so much fun together.

Happy First Birthday, my sweet girl. I am so blessed to be called your mommy.

I love you.

Love,

Mommy

Birthday Eve

2009-12-13T20:50:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it.

Where did an entire year go?

Tomorrow is sweet Jenna's first birthday and while, up until this point I have remained calm, cool, and collected, I am starting to freak out inside. I could cry thinking about this time last year.

I used to play the "this-time-last-[week, month, year]" game every Sunday, since she was born on a Sunday and our Sunday routine made it easy to remember. But today, I kept thinking about last year and what an amazing day that was in the life of our family.

After Jenna turned a week old, my mom said to me, "One down and fifty-one more to go." It did but it didn't seem like a long time at that moment, but I could never have known how quickly those weeks would fly.

And tonight I put my baby down to bed and held her a little closer, just a little longer. She squirmed and just wanted to be put down so she could go to sleep, but I just couldn't put her down. The body that once fit in the crook of my arm now overwhelmed my entire upper body.

Where did the year go and how did it go so fast?

I know that I'll snap my fingers, turn around, and she'll be this independent sixteen year old, ready to start trying to fly on her own.

But tonight, I just held on a little longer. Because these days go by too quickly. And I want to cherish every single one.

One Year Ago Today...

2009-12-08T23:00:00.000-05:00

I was due with my second child, a child I had yet to see or know, a child that I was anxious to meet. The six days between that day and the day she was born were agony because I just couldn't wait to meet my new baby girl. Little did I know how much this little person would change my life.

One year ago today, I was waiting to see who exactly this little girl was. And right now, I am looking at these last six days before her first birthday wondering exactly how I ever lived my life without her.

Falling off the Wagon

2009-12-01T14:52:00.000-05:00

It's been a week or two since I last posted and, believe me, it's not for lack of material! We enjoyed a nice, relaxing Thanksgiving with the kids at my parents' house and it has been nice to lay low lately and get the tree put up and the house decorated for Christmas. It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas (not to be cheesy and quote the song) around here and I just love that magical feel that's in the air. We are really trying to keep the focus on the reason for Christmas: Christ's birth, and we're hoping that that message really comes across to our kids during this Christmas season.

The girl's first birthday is rapidly approaching, less than 2 weeks to go! I can't believe it's already been a year since she joined our family. It's not as sad for me as Nathan's first birthday was, but it is still definitely bittersweet. I am just enjoying her so much and can't wait to see what each new day brings!

So, there's a quick catch up. Maybe we'll get to some pictures next time :)

The Ultimate Cloth

2009-11-20T12:00:00.058-05:00

I was recently given a new cleaning product to use and review. But unlike many cleaning products, this one is chemical-free and very effective. I have been testing The Ultimate Cloth for the past week or so and, from what I have seen of it, I really like it!

As a mother of a crawling child, I am always looking for chemical-free cleaners to use around the house to help her avoid crawling around in anything that is dangerous or toxic. For this reason, I have gone mostly "green" with my cleaning products, carefully choosing non-toxic, natural products to clean with instead of the more traditional, chemically-based products. But this product takes "green" a step further: it is a simple chemical-free cloth that cleans a variety of surfaces, such as glass, tile, laminates, showers and just about any other surface imaginable with just the cloth and water. No chemicals -- just WATER.

What IS The Ultimate Cloth?

The Ultimate Cloth is eco-friendly solution for homes as well as a money and time saver. The Ultimate Cloth is a brand new technology – in fact, it is the only cloth to receive a new patent in the last 25 years. The Ultimate Cloth is a simple, green and effective one-step cleaning process. The Ultimate Cloth cleans any hard surface – glass, wood, granite, stainless steel and many more – with just water! No longer do you have to use harsh chemicals in your home, nor do you need spend hundreds of dollars per year buying them. The Ultimate Cloth has been lab tested to remove 96% of bacteria, without the use of chemicals. And, can cut 50% off your cleaning time. The Ultimate Cloth is truly the ultimate in green cleaning.

How does The Ultimate Cloth work?

The cloth is equipped with a new MiraFiber™ Technology that traps dirt on contact, leaving the surface shiny and clean. Simply wet the towel with warm water, wring it out, and start cleaning.

How do the results compare to traditional cleaners?

The results are amazing. I walked into my kitchen a few hours after cleaning my counters with The Ultimate Cloth and was amazed at how shiny and clean they looked. They are streak-free, spot-free, and sparkling clean. There is no build-up or residue that is commonly left by traditional, chemically-based cleaners, so I feel good because my house looks clean and my kids can safely play on the surfaces cleaned by The Ultimate Cloth.

Where can I get The Ultimate Cloth?

You can click HERE and purchase The Ultimate Cloth on their website. But for a limited time, YOU can receive The Ultimate Cloth for FREE! Simply follow them on Twitter, or become a fan on Facebook. Once you have done either of those two things, they will share with you how you can get your free sample.

Overall, I think this product is a winner. It's worth a try if you're interested in finding a "greener" solution for your cleaning needs.

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*Mama Buzz and its reviewers were provided with
a complimentary sample of The Ultimate Cloth for blog tour purposes*

Two Steppin'

2009-11-19T20:11:00.000-05:00

My Jenna-girl has gotten brave! I've called her a chicken for a while because she can stand independently and cruise along furniture, walls, and other stabilizing structures but she would never take that leap of faith and take a step. She even stooped down from a standing position and then stood back up independently last Sunday, but if you tried to get her to take a step, she would just lunge forward, throwing her entire body in front of her.

Until today.

There have been several occasions where progress has been made towards walking.

The first was at lunch with Grammy and Papa. I lifted her up onto the table (that's a major faux paux, I know) and she put her feet down, stood up, and took two distinctive steps to my dad.

The last few attempts (there were many) have been here at home tonight. She seemed eager to try, so I stood her up and sat closely to her. Little by little, step by step, she would take one, two, and sometimes three steps towards me. I would shriek; she would giggle. This girl is seeing life from a whole new vantage point!

If she had been Nathan, I would probably be eager to give her a big nudge towards the walking world. But, I am in no hurry. I am enjoying seeing her sort of wobble around here, finding her way in this big world. And I know what torture a walking toddler can impose on an innocent family (ha!), so we'll let this girl crawl for as long as she wants.

But, look out world! She may be doing more than a two-step soon!

Eleven Months

2009-11-14T22:54:00.007-05:00

My Sweet Jenna,

It was eleven months ago today that we excitedly welcomed you into our world. That day, eleven months ago, feels like it was an instant ago and yet, here we are, only a month away from your first birthday. I can't believe how quickly time has passed and I know that the next month will pass by like the blink of an eye. Sometimes I wish I could freeze time and keep you just the way you are...

But then, my dear, you wouldn't ever walk! I would have guessed a few months ago that you'd have this walking thing down in no time. You've been standing, unassisted even, for months! You cruise everything...furniture, along walls, various traps that your brother has put in your path. And yet, daddy and I set you up between the two of us, gently hold your hands, and give you a little nudge and either you just stand there, unwilling to budge, or you plop down onto your fanny and just crawl to us. Sometimes I wonder if you're ever going to walk...and then I remind myself that I shouldn't wish for you to walk. Just as soon as you figure that out, I'll probably be wishing you had never learned. Maybe this month?

You have become quite the babbling brook. You wake up in the morning just babbling to yourself and you constantly chatter at everything all day long. You do say actual words, the newest of which are "all done" and "uh-oh." Probably your favorite word is "HOT!" and it's cute because you declare that every drink is hot. I think you think the word for "drink" is "hot." You are too cute.

One of my favorite things about you is the way you adore your brother. When he was gone earlier this weekend, you were lost without him. You woke up this morning and had no idea what to do without him here and when he finally came home, the smile on your face was probably the biggest one I've ever seen. You love him so much. And, Jenna, he adores you. He told me just the other day, "Mom, I love Jenna so much and that's why I'm nice to her." You guys are going to grow up being such great friends.

So here we are, one month away from the big O-N-E. I can't believe it. We've come a long way baby and I have enjoyed every single moment of being your mom. This time last year, I couldn't imagine how I could love someone like I love your brother. Now, I can't imagine how my heart could have felt so shallow and I can't even picture life now without you in it.

You're my girl and I just know that we are going to have a special relationship as you grow. I just can't wait.

I love you, baby.

Love,

Mommy

All Done

2009-11-08T21:16:00.002-05:00

My sweet baby girl has been signing "all done" for a few months now and it's usually a very jagged waving of both hands. It's a sight to behold and I think it looks a bit more like the Pope's side-to-side wave (done with both hands) instead of the actual sign. But hey, I'll take it!

Imagine my surprise when, after dinner last night, my girl belted out "ALL DONE!" while signing the words herself. Oh, she has the sweetest voice in the world and when I heard her say, "ahh duh," it just melted me. She kept saying it and kept waving like a crazy lady until we took her out of the highchair and washed her puppies up (read: hands, for any of you that don't know Papa). After she washes her puppies, she puts her hand to her nose and "smells them up" and then goes around to everyone at the table with her hands held out, ready for them to smell the puppies too.

She's really going crazy lately in speech and development. She also says her own version of "gentle," and can say animals duck and dog, says mama, dada, nay-nay, and papa. Also courtesy of her papa, she can say "hot" (said in such a sweet, drawn out tone with a diligently enunciated "t" sound at the end).

She's growing by leaps and bounds and it's hard for me to imagine that she'll be a year old in a little over a month. What happened to my newborn baby?

Big Thoughts for Little People, by Kenneth N. Taylor

2009-11-06T20:15:00.005-05:00

Big Thoughts for Little People, by Kenneth N. Taylor
Ages 3-7
Hardcover retails for $14.99

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I was recently given the pleasure of reviewing Big Thoughts for Little People: ABC's to Help You Grow (Tyndale House) by Kenneth Taylor. After sitting down and reading it to Nathan (age 3) when we first received it, he has been climbing up into my lap, book in tow, just about every day. He loves this book and I feel good reading it to him!

This durable hardcover book is sturdy and attractive on the outside, but really comes alive when you flip through the pages. The general layout of this book is repetitive, which I think is good for little listeners and learners. Each two-page spread relates to one letter of the alphabet and is followed on the next page by a beautifully detailed illustration which brings the book to life. The repetition continues in content; each letter represents a truth, which is elaborated upon in the same way throughout the book. The first paragraph represents the meaning behind the given letter (i.e. "A is for asking...") in a cute little rhyme and is followed by some very basic description of what the characters are doing on the next page (i.e. "The children and their father are praying..."). Following that are questions that the adult reader can ask to help the child explore and discover the meaning of the Bible truth. At the end of each page, a Scripture verse is given that pertains to the letter and its meaning.

Though I am not a regular reader and studier of Scripture written in The Living Bible and I will agree that some of the referenced verses seemed "bent" a little bit to fit in with the page's theme, I really think that the book, for the most part, did a good job at referencing each Bible truth with a Scripture that could be easily remembered and recalled for the 3-7 year old minds. In my opinion, the issue with Bible translation is a non-issue for me. I was thrilled to be sitting with my son, reading with him about Bible truths, and watching him soak it up like a sponge.

This book seems to be one that Nathan will grow into as he ages. I would definitely recommend this book to any parent looking to teach their child a vast array of Biblical truths. I really appreciated the opportunity to review this book!

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*Mama Buzz and its reviewers were provided with
a complimentary copy of this book for blog tour purposes*

Sharing Our Story

2009-11-04T20:12:00.004-05:00

We've come a long way since those teenage days, haven't we? And after 12+ years of knowing each other, encompassing a little more than 2 years of dating before our current 6+ years of marriage, we are still going strong, still hanging on.

"What inspired this post?" you may ask.

Well, we had a guy from the youth group over this afternoon just for some hanging out and he was curious about our story. You know, it's been a long time since we've really told it to anyone and looking back on everything, I was kind of taken aback by all the memories we've made and all the ups and downs we've went through along the way. It felt good to remember and to share our story together.

Who could have known that the guy that caught my eye as I stepped off of the big brown van (or, Astrovan as it was known) would be the guy that I would end up marrying and building a family with. Who knows if my now father-in-law hadn't approached me about my timidity toward Luke if we would even be together today. What would have happened if Luke hadn't picked up the phone and called me one random day after all those years apart? Some would say it is chance or fate, but I call it God and once again, I look back and am amazed at how the hand of God has lead us to this point. It is pretty amazing.

If our story of meeting, dating, marrying, and living life together is no testament to the glory and goodness of God, man I just don't know what is. And that's not to say that life has been or is perfect. Nay, we go through our trials and joys, our ups and downs as much as any other couple does. But we do it together, taking each leg of the journey step-by-step, holding hands all the way and we do it with God as our focus, knowing that we're in it together, forever.

Life is just so good (even when it's not-so-good) and God is so good, immeasurably good. And I just love our story and I'm thankful that it is not finished being written. We have a long journey yet ahead and the future is bright. I'm really excited to see where life takes us and where we end up!

Proving Pavlov

2009-10-31T12:12:00.004-04:00

Remember learning about Ivan Pavlov from way back in high school psychology? Remember him? The soviet psychologist and his famed and award winning research in classical conditioning? The one who trained the dogs to start salivating (expecting food) when he rung a bell? Well, I think I just found his new test subject.

Enter: my dear son, the cheese grater, and me.

The kid has always had an uncanny love for cheese. He used to sit on the counter with me and eat the cheese by the handful as I grated it. I guess that's where I conditioned him (unaware, of course).

See, when I grate cheese, I always give the grater a good smack after I'm done to release all the cheese that might be stuck on the grater. After hearing me smack the grater for all these years, I guess my son was conditioned to want to eat cheese when he heard that sound. Craziness!

So it cracked me up today when I had to chance to introduce someone else (enter: the daddy) to my little science experiment (that I didn't even know I was conducting). I told Luke to expect Nathan to come running into the kitchen after I finished smacking the grater. So I did it and waited. Nathan, all the while glued to the Wii (that is another story for another day), comes bolting into the kitchen, asking for a "piece of cheese for bees, sneeze, jeeves." We both had a good laugh and did the obligatory eye roll at the wonder of our sweet little son.

So, here you go, Pavlov! Take that!

Meet Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

2009-10-30T20:55:00.005-04:00

Here he is, in all his glory. Mr. Attitude, himself.

There are days when I bask in the glory that is parenting a 3-year-old little boy. And then there are days when I wonder if I'm cut out for this job at all! And who am I kidding by saying 'days'? It is more like 'hours' or 'minutes' lately. One minute, he's my funny, fantastic little boy and the next, he is this maniacal human being who has just been set into a unstoppable tornado.

But you know, the good times are really good. This kid is so funny that I often have a hard time reacting appropriately (read: seriously) in times where he absolutely has me laughing like crazy on the inside. During those times, I have to just look away to avoid sending him the wrong message.

Wanna know what's come out of his mouth lately? Here are the latest funny things:

"Hey mom, I'm making 'tear-up-misu' for you!" (his little version of tiramisu...I have NO idea where he got that)
Upon announcement that his eye drops are coming soon, he always says, "Don't do it, don't do it, don't do it... I'm TIRED!"
Instead of fighting the eye drops with words alone, tonight he ran off saying, "Let me go find a place to hide!"
He ran off with Luke's toothbrush in his old work stuff and replaced it in the toothbrush holder with the perfectly good, newer toothbrush (which he so responsibly threw in the trash). When Luke asked him why he did the great toothbrush switcheroo, he said, "I threw it away because we have a new one for you!"
Luke taught him about the art of freerunning and now he "three runs" all over the house.

I was amazed by his creativity the other day at church. He turned a big blue storage box (where the blocks are stored) upside down, put a big block on top, and was sliding the pretend food along the box top saying, "beeeeeeeeeeep!" and then typing away on the block. He pretended to be a cashier all by himself! Now, I don't know if we can attribute this creative genius to a normally developing 3-year-old or if I should be indicted for my shopping habits! Would it help if I added that I've gotten some great deals lately? :)

I guess it's a good thing he's cute! But really, despite the moments where he is going crazy and out of control (which are pretty few and far between), I really am enjoying this 3-year-old age thing. I love the creativity and independence. I love his developing imagination and the fun things he remembers. And I just love, love seeing him grow. I looked at him tonight and it was just so hard for me to remember or even imagine that he was once growing in my belly. ~~He's~~ We've come a long way...

On My Way to You

2009-10-28T16:52:00.003-04:00

I came across one of my old favorite CDs, the very first CD of Mercy Me. I stole it (well, with his permission!) from his CD player and took it in my car today. What memories! Anyhow, I found a song that perfectly articulates my post yesterday. Here are the lyrics...

On My Way to You
Almost there, almost where I'm supposed to be
It's not all clear, but you keep showing me
With every step, the more my heart moves to your beat
Just like where I'm headed, there's joy in the journey

Teach me to think like you think
Show me the things that are true [ohh]
Finish the work you have started in me
As I'm on my way to you
As I'm on my way to you

Create in me a pure heart and make me new
Less of me, Jesus more of you
Here I stand, still I'm drawn down to my knees
It's not my strength, but Your's that carries me

Teach me to think like to you think
Show me the things that are true
Finish the work you have started in me
As I'm on my way to you
As I'm on my way to you
Yes I'm on my way to you

Taste and See

2009-10-27T14:20:00.003-04:00

Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.
Psalm 37:8

When I was a little girl, I remember having a lot of ideas about what I wanted to do with myself when I grew up. There were many outlandish things that I thought I could do and a few that seemed worthwhile, but at the heart of all of them was one main objective: I wanted to take care of people. So as I grew and became more educated about my choices, I had two main passions and desires.

I wanted to grow up and be a wife and mother; this was definitely number one. If this job was all I ever had in life, I would be perfectly content and lacking for nothing. God gave me a wonderful drive to care for my family and, while it has taken some creativity and hard work, I am fulfilled and satisfied with my role in the home. I can't imagine being anywhere else but home with my kids during these formative years of their lives. I am confident that I'll have no regrets when I look back on these years.

But God, for His glory and in His great pleasure, gifted me with another passion: care for others in a nursing role. At one time, I thought I wanted to be a doctor. In fact, I pursued a high school health sciences program that was gearing me towards an education in medicine but after spending time at patients' bedsides, I discovered that God was leading me towards a career in nursing. I found the intimate, one-on-one, day-to-day responsibilities of a nurse to be exactly what I was looking for. And it was a more family-friendly career to boot. Through all of this, God totally knew what He was planning and I firmly believe it was He who enabled me to find a career that I could love so much, but that I could take a break from in order to be at home with my children. Looking back, it has been so cool to see His hand working in my life.

Lately, my longing for that nursing career has flared up again. I am not sure where God is leading at this point though I know for certain that He desires that I give most of myself to my family at home. But, as I have felt lead, I have been applying for various per diem or very part-time nursing positions that would enable me to be a wife and mother at home and be a successful nurse as well (on a much smaller scale).

I have not accepted a job anywhere and, honestly when it comes down to it, I may not. But I have felt the push of God's hand nudging me to this point. And the cool thing about God is that I don't have to know why He is leading in this direction or where things are all going to end up. I don't have to have all the particulars of how figured out in order to be obedient. The best part is that I just simply listen and obey and wait and then I can sit back and watch how the hand of God is going to move in my life.

Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails. Proverbs 19:21

Someday

2009-10-22T19:16:00.004-04:00

Tonight I had the rare and unique pleasure of spending the entire evening all alone with Jenna. We don't get this opportunity very often for obvious reasons, but we were able to be alone together tonight. We played around, rolled the ball, practiced her ~~walking~~, uh, lunging. I gave her a long bath, sang funny songs, made silly noises, and just tried to get that sweet little giggle to come out. I just love that sound.

Then it was time for her to go to bed and she snuggled up in my arms as I read her a book, Someday by Alison McGhee and Peter Reynolds. This book is particularly near and dear to my heart because it's a book that my mom got me and now I have the unique privilege of reading it to my own daughter. It is basically about the journey a mother and daughter take throughout the daughter's life. It is really sentimental for me.

As I was reading the book, she squirmed around and laid chest to chest with me, laying her head on my shoulder and just relaxed as we rocked back and forth in the glider and finished reading. And all I could think of in that moment was that one day, I was going to look over my shoulder only to find a grown up little lady, not my baby and I'm going to wonder where all the time went. But as I just sat there rocking my baby, I tried to embed a mental image of her on this very night into my brain. And all I could think of was Frank Sinatra's song, The Way You Look Tonight.

Some day, when I'm awfully low,
When the world is cold,
I will feel a glow just thinking of you...
And the way you look tonight.

Yes you're lovely, with your smile so warm
And your cheeks so soft,
There is nothing for me but to love you,
And the way you look tonight.

With each word your tenderness grows,
Tearing my fear apart...
And that laugh that wrinkles your nose,
It touches my foolish heart.

Lovely ... Never, ever change.
Keep that breathless charm.
Won't you please arrange it ?
'Cause I love you ... Just the way you look tonight.

I know that there really will come a day when she gets so big that it'll be hard to remember the sweet little girl she is right now, but I also know that I will never forget tonight...that sweet precious baby snuggled up on my chest and the quiet moments we shared tonight just loving each other.

♪ Let's All Go Down to the Pumpkin Patch ♫

2009-10-16T15:57:00.005-04:00

The whole pumpkin patch extravaganza this year reminded me of that song, the one Nathan and I learned in our first session of music class last year. I think I was singing it or whistling it all day long.

Last Saturday, our little family of four took a fun trip to the best pumpkin patch around. While we were there, we ate a ~~very expensive and unhealthy~~ fun family meal together, visited the barn animals (goats, pigs, chickens, ducks, ponies, etc), walked through the (muddy) corn maze, where Nathan constantly declared, "LOOK! There's corn on the cob!", picked out 3 special pumpkins (one big one for carving, a medium size for display, and a small one for inside the house), and we took pictures of Mr. Nathan next to the measuring board, where I hope we'll measure him every year we go so we can see how big he's grown. It was a FUN time, chilly but fun! I'll let the pictures speak for themselves.

Remembering

2009-10-15T13:42:00.003-04:00

"For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother's womb." Psalm 139:13-14

Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness day and I, along with family and friends as well as many women across the world, will remember the babies that we have lost to miscarriage or infant loss. At 7pm, I will be lighting my own little candle in remembrance of my own sweet baby, one that I never had the chance to meet.

I look forward to the day that I no longer have to remember the life of "would have/could have/should have beens" and get the opportunity to meet that sweet baby face-to-face in heaven.

-----------------------------

"They say that time in heaven is compared to 'the blink of an eye' for us on this earth. Sometimes it helps me to think of my child running ahead of me through a beautiful field of wildflowers and butterflies; so happy and completely caught up in what she is doing that when she looks behind her, I'll already be there." ~Unknown

Ten Months

2009-10-14T21:00:00.002-04:00

My Dearest Jenna,

Today, you are ten months old!! Double digits, baby! Just two more months and you will be a whole year old. Wow...time is going by so fast!

As I thought today about this monthly letter-writing tradition, I wondered what I should write about. Truth be told, I could write forever on all the sweet things I love about you and your ever-blooming personality. You amaze me and absolutely captivate my heart. You my dear (along with your brother, of course) are reason to wake up every morning and do what I do. You make my life meaningful, valuable, and just plainly worth living.

You have accomplished so much in the last month. You are standing unassisted for long periods of time. You even pull yourself to standing and just let go of the furniture and stand there. You also use your little push walker toy to walk all around the house. You can really get going with that thing! Asking you to take a step is a different story though; you just lunge for me and aren't quite sure yet how to get those little legs moving. Soon though, my dear. I'm not sure whether I wish you to walk soon or I just wish you'd stick to crawling for a little while longer. We're going to be opening a new set of challenges when you put movement to those feet! Yikes!

You have added some new words to your repertoire, words like hi!, nay-nay (Nathan, I presume), duck, and dog. Your "hi!" is just so sweet. You love to open up my phone just to see the "baby" on the picture. You say hi and then giggle and smile big when you see yourself. The funniest part is that you open and close the phone a million times just to surprise yourself with your picture. You also love to play peek-a-boo. It is so sweet when you cover your face in the car and play with me through your mirror (though, undoubtedly not the safest game while driving!).

You continue to be a lover of food, often the first and last one sitting down to eat. You eat just about anything and goodness, when you start eating there's just no stopping you! You are nearing the neighborhood of 20 pounds already (a milestone your brother didn't hit until well after a year old!) and I love every single inch of your rolly, chunky little body.

You remain my little sweetheart, capturing the hearts of those around you. You are adorable on the outside and sweet on the inside...happy, content, funny, cute. You are such a blessing to our lives.

Two months, baby, and we'll be singing Happy Birthday to our one-year old. I just can't believe how fast these last ten months ago have passed. Ten months ago right now, I was snuggling my baby girl, getting to know the face I'd dreamed about for the previous nine months. You are no less a puzzle to me now, Jenna. While I know you and a lot of what you're about, I am learning new things about you every day as I see your personality continue to unfold. This is so much fun!

I can't wait to see more of the little girl you are becoming in the months ahead. I can't wait to see the person you will become as you grow. Thanks for being my girl!

I love you so much.

Love,

Mommy

Coupon Book Giveaway

2009-10-08T19:34:00.003-04:00

Isn't it adorable? Ever since Kaley, the writer of the popular mommy/personal finance blog Cha-ching on a Shoestring, posted about the new coupon organizer that her mom made for her, I have been in love :) I've been trying to figure out a way to effectively organize my coupons and I think this may be the ticket!

She and her mom have started selling this sweet organizer (for a whopping $6.95!) in their new Etsy store, but are having a giveaway to kick off the sales! You can check out the details here and enter to win one for yourself! I hope I am the lucky winner :) Otherwise, I know I'll be placing my order for sure.

Turn Around

2009-10-01T19:06:00.006-04:00

When I was a little girl, my mom used to sing this song (by Malvina Reynolds) with tears in her eyes and quivering in her voice. I had no idea then why it struck her with such emotion, but I now understand. It's amazing how quickly a few years can pass like a snap of a finger, leaving you to wonder how the time slipped away so quickly. I can only imagine that I'm going to look away for a second one day and that my little man will be graduating high school or that my little girl will be walking down the aisle. Crazy!

Of course, this song probably has more sentimental application to my daughter (I can tell you that my son does not wear petticoats!). I just think it's really quite special that my mother once sang this song to me and that I am now singing this sweet song to my own daughter. These really are special moments in this time of our lives and I'm trying really hard to cherish each one.

Where are you going, my little one, little one,
Where are you going, my baby, my own?
Turn around and you're two,
Turn around and you're four,
Turn around and you're a young girl going out of my door.
Turn around, turn around,
Turn around and you're a young girl going out of my door.

Where are you going, my little one, little one,
Little dirndls and petticoats, where have you gone?2
Turn around and you're tiny,
Turn around and you're grown,
Turn around and you're a young wife with babes of your own.
Turn around, turn around,
Turn around and you're a young wife with babes of your own.

At a Loss for Words

2009-09-24T21:36:00.002-04:00

Today would have been the 1st birthday of our precious baby that left us far too soon. While I have reconciled these emotions in my head and in my heart, I still remember...and I still grieve for what would have been. It gives me great peace, though, to believe in my heart that the baby went straight from my womb and into the arms of God.

And with your final heartbeat
Kiss the world goodbye
Then go in peace, and laugh on Glory's side, and
Fly to Jesus
Fly to Jesus
Fly to Jesus and live!
(from Untitled Hymn by Chris Rice)

If You Give a Mom a Cookie...

2009-09-22T14:04:00.003-04:00

Written by Julie Tilsner

If you give a mom a cookie, she's going to want a latte to go with it.

But before she gets a latte she has to find her toddler's pink ladybug boots, to find the ladybug boots, she has to go venture into the playroom, when she tries to straighten up the playroom, she finds Daddy's left shoe, the salad bowl, and a open box of graham crackers.

She also finds her cell phone. So she'll yell at her toddler about the cell phone and wake up the baby from his morning nap, but if she goes to pick up the baby the cell phone will ring. When she answers it will be the doctor's office reminding her that she had an appointment this morning and would she like to reschedule, say sometime in November?

While she is trying to mentally recreate her calendar the baby will start to cry, then her toddler will run to see what is the matter and find the graham crackers, and there will be crumbs all over the playroom, so the mom will get the broom from the hall closet and notice that Daddy forgot to buy diapers last night as she had asked, BUT she will find her toddler's pink ladybug boots, and when she finds the pink ladybug boots she will remember her emergency stash of diapers in the car.

So she will wrestle her toddler and her baby into their car seats and drive to the store to buy more diapers and more milk, while she is buying the milk she will remember she wanted a latte, and if she manages to order her latte without a temper tantrum or poop episode from either one of her kids...

Then she is going to need another cookie.

It's a New Day, It's a New Dawn...

2009-09-21T21:31:00.007-04:00

It's a new life for me (well, us). And I'm feeling good...(insert wide range of emotions here. Happy? Sad? Lonely for the little guy?).

Yes, I know. I ripped off the lyrics from Michael Bublé's "Feeling Good" to describe my feelings for Nathan's first day of preschool coming up tomorrow. ::sigh::

Can anyone explain how the little boy that I, myself, carried for nine months, gave birth to, and spent every waking minute with is on his way to preschool in the morning? I mean, how did it all happen so fast?

It's the first little nudge out of the nest, and as Luke literally just looked over at me and said, we're gonna turn around and he'll be graduating high school. I just don't even believe it.

Here's a picture we took tonight for his first school project (which, we've learned is a joke. School projects for kids mean more work for the parents!). I love it!

Motherhood Means...

2009-09-18T15:59:00.003-04:00

...folding and sorting an entire basket of clean laundry only to have it tipped over and ravaged by your 9 month old little girl.

BUT, she was so cute and so content in doing it that I just couldn't stop her. Forget about the fact that there are a few other baskets of clothes that have yet to be folded and that now we'll add this one to the list again, but I just couldn't stop her!

Back to regularly scheduled (or unscheduled, as the case may be) folding.

Preschool is Upon Us

2009-09-17T14:50:00.002-04:00

Luke and I visited Nathan's preschool last night. It was a meeting for the parents of the preschoolers to just iron out a few things and to let us in on what to expect. Since Nathan starts next Tuesday, the time for all that is NOW.

The nostalgic feeling I get by walking into the preschool hallway is incredible. The smell, all the little "things" - potties, tables, chairs, toys, etc. They all take me back. I have a few vivid memories of my years in preschool and now, here I am. *I* have a preschooler myself. How my kid went from a tiny baby to a big, independent preschooler is really beyond me.

Anyway, the meeting went well. We met all of the staff members and then followed his teacher to his little class. I have to say that I was very impressed by Mrs. B, his teacher. She was funny and warm and I really just got the impression that she was going to do a great job helping Nathan grow and learn in the year to come. I was also very impressed as I read through the handbook and knew immediately when I read the first goal that we had chosen the right school for out little boy. It reads as follows,

"to introduce Christian values through the teacher's example and grace at snack time, which emphasize God's love for us and Jesus Christ's role as a friend to all children."

Of course the rest of the goals, philosophies, and teaching methods are amazing, but just to know that they were going to be reinforcing our Christian values was something that really put me at ease. I am excited that Nathan is going to be able to learn more about who God is from someone other than us and his grandparents. It will be nice for him to learn by someone else's example.

Mrs. B gave us a letter for Nathan to open up at home and he was just thrilled to have gotten mail! Inside was a sweet little note telling him how excited she is to meet him, and there was also a little fish sticker, which will match the sticker on his cubby and placemat at school so that he can recognize his things. He put his letter in his little backpack for safe keeping and we'll be bringing that with him on is first day.

So, school is just a few short days away. While we will be phasing him into the school day slowly, with several 1/2 time classes for the first few days, Tuesday will really be the first day ever that I've dropped him off with anyone other than family. I'm excited, but also a little bit sad to see this chapter of his life come to a close. I know there are many, many more chapters in the book of his life, but this time spent solely at home has been precious and a special commdity to me. It's a little sad to think that when he starts school next week, he'll never be totally with me at home ever again. Hmph.

But I really look forward to seeing how he is going to grow and progress in this year to come. I think he is going to flourish at this particular school and I can't wait to see what the year brings!

Wordless Wednesday

2009-09-16T14:04:00.002-04:00

Big and Beautiful

2009-09-15T21:13:00.002-04:00

Jenna's my chunky monkey. Where Nathan was aiming towards the bottom of the growth chart around 9 months, my girl is aiming towards the top. Though she is dropping slowly and steadily in the percentiles, she is still bigger than Nathan was at this age. I have to keep myself from playing the comparison game, too. She is what she is; he is what he is. They are different! Didn't you catch that post?

Anyway, I took Miss Jenna to her 9 month appointment yesterday, where we started the appointment off with an entire office of nurses gathering around to coo at my little girl. She really is so happy to oblige all the stares and baby talk that comes her way. She usually just smiles her toothy grin, puts her hand in the air and waves it around.

Getting to the point, here, I thought I'd just post her stats...

Weight: 19lbs 6oz - 65%
Height: 28 1/2 inches - 75%

She is very healthy and that's about all I could ask for!

Nine Months

2009-09-14T19:46:00.003-04:00

My Dearest Jenna,

Today, you are nine months old and, from this point onward, you will be outside longer than you were inside of me. Now THAT is a bittersweet thought. These nine months have added so much joy to our family in the form of you and, really, I don't think I could ever put into words just how much I love you.

You are beautiful on the outside. There is not a day that goes by that someone doesn't stop to stare at you and talk to you. You always oblige them and "talk" back and you usually wave. Sometimes you snuggle your face into my chest and show a tiny bit of shyness (I secretly love it when you do that). You are also beautiful on the inside. From what I've learned of you in these last nine months, you are content and thoughtful; you are happy to sit back and observe. You are a smiler for sure, lighting up the room with that big, beautiful smile of yours. Your daddy has trained you well; you flash those pearly whites whenever a camera is pointed in your direction. You are a total sweetheart...it is undeniable!

This month has been a fun one! You got 3 more teeth (and a double ear infection to boot...boooo!) to round out the front 8.

You crawl FAST now and are into everything you can get your hands on. You are still pulling up on everything and you've started cruising a bit and making your way around the living room via the couches. You even stood independently for a few seconds the other day but when you finally realized what you were doing, you sat down.

You also made the transition to full table foods - no more purees for you! You got your first taste of "real" food and never looked back. You sure love your food. You whine, cry, squeal, grab, kick, etc when you see food that you want. As much as I've tried to feed you healthy stuff, I think your favorite food is french fries. You will spit anything out when you see a french fry within reach!

You started saying "mama" within the last week and you have been saying it today non-stop! You have no idea what I feel in my heart when I hear that word come out of your mouth. Keep talking, baby girl. I absolutely love to hear you say my name!

Your relationship with your brother continues to grow and my heart melts when I see you two interacting together. He is SO good to you and you look at him like he's the best thing in the world. I'm so happy you two have each other.

You are a hugger; you reach up for me sometimes and you wrap your arms around my neck and hold on tight for a long time. I never want those moments to pass because they are so special to me. I am so looking forward to the time we'll get to spend together as girls as you grow up. We are going to have such a great relationship.

I am so excited to see what this next month brings. Will you start walking? What will be your next word? Isn't it hard to believe that in just three short months, that you'll be a year old? How does time fly so FAST? I am looking forward to watching you grow and change in the days ahead. Part of me wants to keep you as you are, small and dependent on me. But the bigger part of me wants to see what you do with yourself as you grow. I just know that you are going to continue to be a sweetheart as you grow up. I can't wait to experience new things with you.

I love you, Jenna. You are so very special to me and I value each day that I get the privilege to be your mommy.

Love you,

Mommy

The Little Things

2009-09-11T07:58:00.003-04:00

Today, as we were driving down the road, Nathan broke the silence and said sweetly,

"Mommy, when I grow up can I be a daddy?" Shocked by the sweetness in his voice and the innocence of the question, I said,

"Sure son, you absolutely CAN be a daddy. One day you'll grow up and meet a nice girl, get married, and then you can be a daddy." And then he said, all excited,

"Oh good! I am going to take MY son to the fireworks!"

The boy is getting to the age where he will start to remember things forever. Heck, it was over 2 months ago that the boys went alone together to the fireworks and had a really amazing time. He talks about other fun things we do too, like Sunday trips to see the waterfalls or a Science Center, the things we do together just because we love to BE together. When we're together, it's like we don't have a care in the world. It's always so nice to be away with our little family, doing things we love to do.

When this boy and, presumably this girl, grow up, they are going to remember lots of little things about their childhoods. Except, like in this instance, the little things are going to be so magnified in their minds. And we will be so glad that we took the time to accomplish the little things. Because, in their eyes, little goes a long way.

Irony Is...

2009-09-08T08:41:00.003-04:00

...blogging about the extensive differences between your two children and then taking them to the walk-in clinic, only to find that they BOTH have the exact same ailment. Double ear infections all around! While we should have been out enjoying the last official holiday of summer, we were stuck inside amidst snotty-nosed, warm-cheeked children. Not a bad day in hindsight, but I hope they kick this thing fast!

Like Night and Day

2009-09-07T08:04:00.003-04:00

It's odd to me how unbelievably different two kids can be, even when the have the same parents. The list of differences between my two kids is long and quite extensive. It starts off with the obvious: he's a boy, she's a girl. But it gets deeper than that. One of the big differences I've been observing for a while is the gross motor vs. speech and language development.

Nathan was Super Word Boy, babbling like crazy from a very early age, forming words and sounds, and knocking the socks off anyone in earshot. He was amazing and, to this day, he still is amazing in his phrasing and word usage. He may have been very verbally advanced, but his motor skills were never a priority for him. He army crawled around 9 months, crawled on his hands and knees at around 10 months, pulled up around 10.5 months, and didn't start walking until 13.5 months or so. I guess it really is true when they say that most babies tend to focus on one skill and put the other one off for a while.

Jenna, on the other hand, is Miss Mobile. In fact, having been primed by Nathan, I was not prepared for the early mobility I've endured with the girl. She rolled back-to-belly in a matter of weeks after she was born, she started army crawling around 6 months, crawled on her hands and knees around 7 months, and started pulling up at 8 months. Lately, she's been cruising and even getting brave and letting go from time to time. Eek! But I'm not ready for her to walk! On the other side of the spectrum in terms of speech and language development, she is not what I would say is "behind," but she is definitely more quiet than her brother. The only two terms I have heard her repeatedly use appropriately is "dada" and "dah" (for dog). Just yesterday, I heard her mutter "mama" but I couldn't get her to replicate things. She is mostly quiet and reserved, but when you get her started, BEWARE!

It is so interesting to me to see these babies grow and develop as individuals. I love them both so much - for all of the ways they are the same and for all of the ways they are different. What a blessing it is to be called their mommy.

Teeth #7 and #8

2009-09-05T23:00:00.001-04:00

This is a quick post, mainly for record keeping and such, but my big girl got the last two teeth we've been waiting a while for, totaling her pearly whites at 8! She is finally balanced with 4 on the top and 4 on the bottom. NOW, I think we may get a teething breather for a month or two (at least we can hope!).

Life is good here. The girl is cruising and starting to get a little more adventurous and letting go from time to time. I imagine it won't be long until she takes those first steps. The boy is funnier than ever and is really looking forward to preschool that starts in about 2 weeks...eek!

Life is crazy, but we're trying to make the most of it and get our days in at the park and such while we still have the nice weather to do so. Before we know it, we'll be bundling up to face a long winter. Boo!

Tooth #6...Finally!

2009-08-28T21:35:00.000-04:00

We've been waiting on these top two teeth for a while now. Ever since she got her fangs (the teeth on the other side of where the front two teeth would be), I've thought that the middle ones were coming. It's been a longer wait than I expected, but the first is finally in and I can see the other tooth through the skin (OUCH!).

She's been fairly discontent, so I hope her attitude perks up a little bit. And that she starts sleeping later. These 6am wake up calls have been a doozy and, though she is sleeping through the night, I am still quite exhausted.

"Follow Me"

2009-08-17T13:22:00.003-04:00

Luke 9:23
Then he said to them all: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me."

I've had quite the negative attitude lately and things that shouldn't have been causing me so much tension and discontent were getting in the way of enjoying the wonderful life that God has given me. I don't know where it all began, but I imagine it was somewhere down the road when I took my eyes of Jesus and started looking at the craziness around me. I became overly critical and mean spirited and I was in quite the funk.

Yesterday, we started off to do the Sunday thing, which in our family means waking early, heading to church, practicing for worship team, feeding our hungry kids while trying to shove the food down our own throats, dropping them off at Sunday School (although I helped teach in Nathan's class yesterday...we had a blast!), picking them up, rushing to the sanctuary to make it in time to lead worship, listen to the message (or work in the nursery, which seems to happen more often than not), pick up the kids from the nursery again, and race out the door to lunch. By the time we're ready to go home, we are all exhausted! Goodness, I'm tired just reading over that list! It's quite the marathon of a day, and a lot of times we have church on Sunday night too.

As I spent more and more time at church yesterday, I realized that the attitude of the past few weeks was deplorable (to say the least) and that realization caused me to question my motives. At that point, I resolved in my heart to serve with a joyful spirit, to not be overcome with criticism and dismay, and to serve in the capacities that I do for Jesus and for none other. It seemed to be at that moment that I felt a still, small voice whispering, "Follow Me." It wasn't audible, nor can I even really expound upon the feeling I had deep within my soul. I just felt that God was speaking into my life and demanding that I leave my bad attitude and my bad intentions and just simply follow.

As the day progressed, and even into today, I have felt especially impressed upon by the Holy Spirit to follow His lead. I have been an awful follower as of late and that is something that I am not too proud about. I don't have it all figured out and if I look like I have it all together, I am fooling you.

The truth is that in my life these days, there are circumstances that could be rightfully worrisome and unsettling. The winds of change are coming and I vacillate between being excited and just simply being scared. But yesterday, I felt like God was telling me that it is my job just to follow and His job to lead. That doesn't mean that He won't lead me into scary circumstances; it just simply means that He will guide and protect me as we walk together down those roads. There is incredible peace in this fact.

When my kids look back on my life and their childhoods spent at home with me, I don't want them to remember grumbling or criticism or discontent. I want them to see a woman who was passionately sold out for the things she was called by God to do. I want them to see that my life was characterized by a pattern of following, even when times were tough and situations were unsettling. I'm working on it, but I have a long way to go.

Eight Months

2009-08-14T22:04:00.003-04:00

My Dearest Jenna,

You are eight months old today and my feelings are torn. While it seems like you cannot possibly be eight months old already, I feel like you have been around forever. Eight months is not a very long time, my love, but I really don't remember what our life was like without you in it. It's crazy how time does that to you!

This month has been so much fun! You have started pulling up on everything (yes, in your crib too!). You crawl so fast and so furiously that it's hard to keep up with you sometimes. While you can crawl on your hands and knees, you still choose the army crawl most of the time because you can move more quickly right now. You also have three new teeth in very weird places. Hopefully soon you'll get those other three teeth to round out the first eight.

My most favorite part of this month has been to see the relationship with your brother blossom and change. He went from being an onlooker into your life to being an active participant and he has you absolutely captivated. He listens for you to wake up from your naps so that he can jump in your crib with you and play. Sometimes I listen quietly outside your door to the two of you giggling. When I go in, you have the sweetest look on your face as you stand in awe of that big brother of yours. I especially love to play "I've Got the Joy-Joy-Joy" in the car for you. Even if Nathan is not in his seat next to you, you look in his direction, get a big smile on your face, and let out a huge cackle. It is hilarious because you could be well on your way to sleeping and when the song comes up, your eyes open wide and you smile big. I just love the way you interact with your brother and I love seeing how he protects you in his own little way.

You learned your first sign this month, too and you use it all the time. I can't wait to teach you other signs and help you communicate with us before you have the words. You sure learned fast. It took you about a week to grasp "more" and I was amazed at how quickly it came to you!

I am so looking forward to the next month. I can't wait to see if you'll be standing or even walking, what new words you may learn to sign or even say, and the way you continue making your mark on the world. I am so excited at your life; it is a pleasure watching you grow.

Jenna, your sweet affect and big smile draws people to you. I don't think there's a day that goes by that a random stranger doesn't come up to tell me how beautiful you are. They're right - you are beautiful. And I know that as time goes by, you won't just be beautiful on the outside, but you'll be beautiful on the inside as well.

I love you so much. I'm so proud to be your mama (now if only I could get you to say that word!).

Love,

Mommy

Keeper of the Home

2009-08-11T22:47:00.002-04:00

I've been someone's wife for just over 6 years and someone's mother for just over 3 years now. I gave up my long-sought-after career to stay at home with my kids. Never in my entire life did I feel God's calling so strongly as I did when I made the decision to stay home in the first place. And I say that I made the decision, but honestly the decision was made long ago; it was merely reconfirmed when the kids actually started arriving in my life.

Of those years that I've been wearing many hats at home, such as wife, mother, cook, house cleaner, grocery shopper, appointment maker, nurse, etc, I don't think I've really well exemplified the woman described in Titus 2 or the Excellent Wife, as described in Proverbs 31. And while I know that the most important tasks were being accomplished by being who my family needed me to be, I know that I could be so much more. Sure, I loved and respected my husband, I cared for and taught my children, but I can't say that I was a great keeper of the home.

I've been working on that.

I have been studying the art of couponing and have been inspired by women all over the world who are saving mass amounts of money for their family. In just a few short days, I have learned that I can buy my family quality food, clothing, even diapers for a LOT less money than I used to. It does take a little bit of time and effort, but I am working on this aspect of my role in the home. It is sometimes hard for me to grasp the fact that I don't contribute any financial benefit to my family (disclaimer: this is a self-perceived shortcoming and not one my husband places on my whatsoever) and I've realized that I can benefit my family so much by just spending a few hours a week (if that!) planning my purchases and making thoughtful decisions. Just this week alone, I have saved over $60 by making a plan of attack. How very rewarding!

I've also started on an aggressive cleaning schedule (although you really wouldn't really know by the look of my house at the moment!) which has me doing a few little things every day that amount to a pretty darn clean house all of the time. I wouldn't say that the house of the old Alison was a terribly messy sty or anything, but it probably wasn't as clean as I would have liked. I have been motivated by the feeling of having my kids playing and growing in cleanliness instead of disorder and not-so-clean conditions.

I guess what the main gist of this whole thrust is that I am aiming to be a keeper of the home. And not just ANY keeper of the home, but a good one. I want to do the best by my family and will do anything I can to make that happen. I love these guys!

Baby Sign Language

2009-08-09T21:59:00.003-04:00

As I endeavored with Nathan, I have started with trying to teach Jenna tidbits of sign language to make her progression towards real language a bit easier. I started with the sign for "more" last week just sat down with her and her Cheerios (the plain old ones, her favorite) and started using the sign before offering them to her. Oftentimes I'd have her replicate the motion by moving her own hands in the appropriate manner. I can't say that I was always consistently teaching and demonstrating, but I tried to use the sign whenever I audibly said the word.

After only a week, I am so proud to report that she signs it! We were at her Auntie and Frunkle's house tonight and they were feeding her Cheerios (fruity ones, actually. A first.) and she looked at Auntie and signed "more!" She normally claps open-handed and this was an intentional, close-fisted motion. She did it! She even signed repeatedly as Auntie kept feeding her! I was flabbergasted, to be honest, and especially glad to have witnesses, you know, in case a family member or two accused me of lying further down the road when Jenna wasn't exactly up to performing. *ahem* Moving on...

Next on the agenda is "all done." I'd also like to get "please," "thank you," "milk," and a few other ones in there, too. If this week is any indication as to how our future with signing goes, I think she'll do great!

Tying Up Loose Ends

2009-08-05T13:35:00.005-04:00

I feel like between the bronchitis that annoyingly and surprisingly hit me at the end of July and Nathan's 3rd birthday, I have been exhausted and just trying to slow down a bit. Things got pretty hectic and now they are starting to slow down. I'm enjoying it! I've been particularly enjoying the mandatory rest period for me during nap times. While I normally get my work out done during the kids' naps, I have been forced to take a break for a week or two to let my lungs rest. It's been nice to lounge around in the middle of the day!

Anyway, new things are brewing at our house. Jenna is just absolutely zooming through milestones these days. It seems that she masters one thing and then moves on the next day to something totally different. Since I've been too lazy to blog these happenings as they occur, I'll shoot them off in bullet format.

After repeated and consistent lessons from Grammy, she waves. While we used to have to kind of prompt her to get her going, she waves now all the time. Sometimes the wave reminds me of a princess, other times the Pope, and still other times, she just goes crazy and is waving like a madwoman. Silly girl.
Grammy has been busy because, again, after consistent singing and repetitive movements, Jenna has learned to clap! Mom sings her "Can you clap your hands" song and Jenna starts right up. It has been very sweet because, just in the last week, she has started clapping about everything and always has a huge smile on her face while she does!
Jenna is popping out teeth in record time. In the last week, we have found 3 new teeth (in very unexpected places) and are waiting for the arrival of 3 more that might just burst through at any moment. In order to show, rather than to try to explain where the teeth are in her mouth, I made a handy-dandy chart. Here's what it looks like as of late. The older teeth are red, the new teeth are yellow (I told you they were in weird spots!) and the blue teeth are eagerly anticipated.

Jenna has been army crawling for a few weeks now and I keep waiting for her to just get up on her knees and take off. She'll do a couple of scoots like that, but she still hasn't taken the plunge completely. She is getting super fast though!
I walked into her room the other day and found her STANDING in her crib. Oh my goodness, I so was not ready for this! Since Nathan didn't walk or even show an interest in walking until 14 months, I really didn't anticipate this happening early with Jenna. She now pulls up on everything and is just going crazy with being able to pull herself up in bed. We're having great time in the bedtime department :)

So that's the baby girl a nutshell for now. She's getting so big and I am really enjoying her babyhood a ton. I can't believe that she'll be one in 4ish months. It really has flown.

Mr. Nathan had a fantastic birthday. I know I need to post pictures but I haven't gotten around to it. He had his 3-year appointment today and I thought I'd share stats. He was 26lbs 14oz and 35.25 inches long. Still teeny, in the 6th percentile, but very healthy. Our pediatrician was impressed that he was already potty trained and also at his verbal skills. We have a GREAT kid on our hands and have really been enjoying him lately. He seems to have overcome much of the "terrible twos" and it's nice to actually have some peace on a consistent basis!

Happy 3rd Birthday, Nathan!

2009-07-25T22:31:00.004-04:00

My dearest Nathan,

Today you are 3 years old! It's unbelievable to me how quickly time has gone...where did my baby go? I don't see a baby when I look into your face any longer; I see a boy who has experienced some of life. I see a boy who's about to experience preschool. Wow, unbelievable. You are our firstborn and, in many ways, this is as much of an "anniversary in parenting" as it is a birthday for you. Thanks for letting us test out our stuff on you.

We had a very special day today. This is really the first birthday that you were excited for and that you were really aware of what was going on. You have long insisted on a Scooby Doo birthday and, my boy, I do believe I delivered on that one :)

The day started out (early) with breakfast at Cracker Barrel (your suggestion) where you had eggs, bacon, and chocolate milk with Grammy, Papa, Grandma, Aunt Tammy, AJ, Brookie, Adrienne, Daddy, Jenna, and me. Afterwards, daddy took you to Otsiningo Park to play on the playground and the rocks. After that, daddy planned a special treat for you; he took you to your very first movie in a movie theater! You guys went to see Ice Age 3 and you came home reporting that you ate popcorn and candy and drank Sprite. Daddy got some great pictures of you in the movies. You loved the movie and just couldn't say enough about your first theater experience. What special memories you guys made! Your party started later in the day and we had all your friends over - Markey, Dominic, Cody, Jeremy, Brookie, and Aunt Emily, Uncle Ryan, and Joel showed up to help you celebrate. I made dinner and we had a Scooby Doo cake and Scooby snacks that I made as favors. It was the PERFECT day!

My little man, you have changed so much over the course of just a year. You are bigger, brighter, and more independent. You shock and amaze me with the things you remember and the quick manner in which you learn. Sometimes your daddy and I sort of glance at each other when something profound comes out of your mouth and we give each other a look that says, When did he learn to do THAT?! Can you believe what he just said?! We may have hard days, but there isn't a day that goes by that we don't go into your room long after you've gone to bed, move you back to the top of the bed, and marvel at what a sweet, special little guy you are. We are in awe of you, Nathan, and we count our many blessings every day that God gave you to our family. You are a precious and cherished addition.

In the last year, you've become a brother. What a special bond you have with your little sister. You never showed an ounce of jealousy towards her and have usually been helpful, interested, and protective of her little life. I know she'll grow up to appreciate that one day :) My heart just melts when you guys have little conversations in the back seat of the car. You both start cracking up and I know that all the fears I had about adding a sibling to you have been wiped away. I gave you a playmate and a friend for life. You guys are lucky to have each other. I can't wait to see how you bond and grow closer together in the year to come.

This year holds great things for you, my boy. I can't wait to see how you continue to grow into a strong, smart little boy. I can't wait to see you how excel and succeed in preschool and what friends you make there. I am excited to see how your love for music expands. I am just excited to see more glimpses of the boy that I know God is growing you to be. I'm sure that the year won't be without its challenges, but I know that you will take every challenge that you face head on and that you will grow and change for the better.

Nathan, I could not be prouder of you. Your life is such a joy to mine. I love you so much...never forget that. Happy Birthday, baby.

Love,

Mama

Countdown to 3 - 2 Years

2009-07-23T14:41:00.002-04:00

Nathan's 2nd Birthday - he liked the boxes better than the gifts inside!

Vacation in Kitty Hawk in August

Random Favorites from last winter

Countdown to Three - 1 Year

2009-07-22T14:14:00.004-04:00

Nathan at his party on his first birthday.

The after party. He loved his baths!
Christmas 2007 - 17 months

18 Months

19 Months

21 Months

Countdown to Three - 6 Months

2009-07-21T09:04:00.002-04:00

Here is my little Mister at 6 months, exactly. I guess I never realized 1) how extremely bald he was and, 2) how chunky he was! Maybe his sister isn't so huge after all. :)

Countdown to Three - Birth

2009-07-20T09:17:00.003-04:00

Here is my soon-to be-birthday boy on the day he was born.

New Developments

2009-07-17T22:21:00.002-04:00

Life has been nutso with our church's Vacation Bible School happening this last week and a few fun things have transpired in the lives of my children that I thought were noteworthy.

Miss Jenna is on her way to crawling and has made huge strides in just this past week. She went from not nearly crawling to army crawling and almost-real-crawling in just a few short days. I suspect it won't be long until she's full-fledged crawling. Watch out world, she's on the move and when she gets going, she's never going to stop!

Also, yesterday I noticed that she was saying, "dadadada" over and over again, despite my best efforts to get her to say "mama" first. Truth be told, I don't really care which she said first and I was just as happy as anything to hear her say, "dada." She has such a sweet little voice.

Boboo is back!!! I remember Nathan did "boboo boboo" forever using the back of his hand, so much so that I actually called him Boboo for quite a long time (and still do sometimes). I was amazed one day as I was driving to church to hear her boboo-bobooing it up in the back seat. That set Nathan off and both of them were boboo-bobooing. Ha, it was hilarious.

Her top gums are bulging to the max and I don't think it'll be long until we add 2 more teeth (at least) to her collection of pearly whites. I, for one, cannot WAIT for those babies to come in. She has been a clingy mess.

I know there was something specific I wanted to note about Mr. Nathan (the almost-birthday boy), but for the life of me, I can't remember. I'm gonna have to come back with that one and maybe, just maybe, we'll do a "past and present" post in honor of his upcoming birthday. I can't believe my little man will be 3 in just a week! Yikes!

Seven Months

2009-07-15T09:04:00.002-04:00

Dear Sweet Jenna-girl,

I know that I say this every month and, heck, I probably say it once a day at least, but I can't believe that you have been around for seven months. It really seems like yesterday that we went to the hospital for you to be born and now here you are, a beautiful big girl with a blooming personality. While I am enjoying the newest stages of your life, I sometimes wish I could slow things down a little bit. You are growing way too fast.

You have really exploded in personality and development in this past month. You have been enjoying the food that mommy makes for you. You love squash, sweet potatoes, pears, peaches, prunes, and bananas. You hate rice, oatmeal, and peas and you are not too keen on green beans or carrots either. We're going to try apples next and I think you'll like those. You have mastered the task of using the sippy cup...you know how to bring it to your mouth and tip it back. I am impressed!

You are a professional sitter; you sit with stability and strength and it seems like you mastered this trick just overnight. You are a super roller, rolling and pivoting to get to any destination (usually to get some paper product off in the distance). In the last week or two, you have begun to get up on your hands and knees and rock. Sometimes you push yourself forward with your feet and plunge forward. I suspect that it won't be long until you really crawl. Just amazing; it is fun to see you move!

Your little personality is so precious. You are a mama's girl, for sure. You're happy to go to anyone except for when I'm around, when you're most happy just to stay in the safety of my grasp. You often cry when I go out of sight and into another room of the house and are instantly happy again when I come back. On the other hand though, you can be a loner. You are perfectly happy to sit on the floor with your toys for a while and just observe what's going on around you.

You learned to wave last Wednesday (7/8). Grammy would take your hand and show you how to wave and then you would wave in a few sweeping motions with your arm and you've been a waving girl ever since. How'd you get big enough to do that?!

In this next month, I am looking forward to watching you really get into crawling. I know that you and your brother are going to have new kinds of fun when you really get on the move. I'm also expecting your top teeth to FINALLY erupt from your gums. You've been fairly miserable over the course of the last few days and I'm ready for you to be feeling like yourself again and I also can't wait to see how you look with two new pearly whites!

Jenna, the connection and bond that I have with you is indescribable. You are sweet and funny and the way you cling to me makes my heart melt. When you reach your arms out, grab, my face, and pull me in close to you, I feel such an overwhelming sense of honor and joy to be your mommy. You have certainly added a new level of love to our family and I am thankful for your precious little life.

I love you, Jenna. I always, always will.

Love,

Mommy

Adventures in Baby Food Making

2009-06-16T21:01:00.009-04:00

Being the frazzled, new mom type that I think I was with Nathan, I opted not to make his baby food. For whatever reason, I enjoyed perusing the baby food aisle and spending gobs of money on purees for him. This time around with Jenna, feeling a bit more like a cross between Supermom and Martha Stewart, I have chosen to make all of the baby food purees and cereal powders. I have found, in just a week or so, that it really isn't that big of a deal.

Since Jenna hasn't been too fond of homemade rice cereal or oatmeal, I decided to move on to something a wee bit more tasty. Today, I went to Wegman's and stocked up on all the organic yellow and orange veggies I'd need for the next few weeks - acorn squash, sweet potatoes, and carrots. I figure that'll give us enough to handle for a few weeks.

I started with the acorn squash. I opted to cook it in the microwave as opposed to baking it for 45 minutes or so on 400 degrees because today was a warm day and I couldn't imagine heating the house for that long. So, I took the raw acorn squash, cut it in half, emptied it of the "guts" (seeds and stringy insides), cut it once more into quarters, and placed it meat-side down on a plate. I covered it with plastic wrap and popped it in the microwave for 10 minutes.

When I took it out of the microwave, the rind (??) was soft enough for me to leave an indent with my finger. After letting it cool for a bit, I used a spoon to separate the meat from the rind.

Then I added it to my small blender.

I pureed it a bit first without any water and then added enough water to make a smooth, thin puree. I probably used between 1/2-3/4 cups of water until it was thin enough for my liking.

Afterward, I cleaned a regular old ice cube tray and spooned the mixture into the trays (one acorn squash made 2 whole trays). I covered them with plastic wrap and popped them into the freezer for about 2 hours.

After the cubes were frozen, I popped the puree cubes out of the trays, put them in labelled freezer bags, and stored them in the freezer for future use.

When I needed some squash for Jenna's dinner tonight, I took a few cubes out, thawed them, added some oatmeal and ~~freshly squeezed boob juice~~ pumped breast milk.

Can you believe that one acorn squash (approximately $2) made around 32 ounces of baby food? That is crazy to me! And it was SO easy.

And here's the best part...She liked it! She hadn't been a fan at all of the grains - fussing, cringing, and refusing to open her mouth. Today is the first day in her solids journey that she actually opened her mouth! I was one proud mama! If you don't recall, I briefly tried my hand at this baby food making thing when Nathan was a little bit older than Jenna is now. It did not go so well. I'm glad to say that this time was a success.

So, since I was too busy feeding my willing child her squash, I wasn't able to snap a picture of the momentous occasion. Here is a shot of her in the bathtub afterward. Looks happy, eh?

Next up is sweet potato (which is actually baking away right now!). Watch out...here we come!

6 Month Stats

2009-06-15T15:08:00.003-04:00

I took the little Miss for her 6 month appointment today. I'm always eager to see what she weighs. I knew she was getting heavy and guessed that she'd be around 17 pounds. Here are the "official" stats:

weight: 17 lbs 2 oz --> 64th percentile, down from the 90th+ in previous months.
height: 26 1/4 inches --> 58th percentile, down from the 95th in previous months.

So, she's experiencing the bit of a slowing down in weight and height just like Nathan did starting around 6 months. She is very healthy and the doctor says she's just perfect. She got 3 shots and took them like a trooper. Hopefully she isn't affected by them too much in the next few days.

Six Months

2009-06-14T21:13:00.005-04:00

Dearest Jenna Caroline,

Today, you are six months old. Happy half-Birthday! Wow, six months already. You'll be a year old before you know it. It's hard for mommy to imagine you getting so big, so fast but it's happening before my eyes. You are already so much bigger than when we brought you home.

Your monthly pictures are getting very difficult to take. You are a lover of all things paper and just when I thought that last month's picture couldn't have been any harder to snap, this month was nearly impossible. Case in point: the two pictures above. Notice the wrinkled sign next to you in the first one and then the picture of you eating the paper when I just finally gave up. Yes, you love your paper. I don't know what we're going to do next month (or for the next 6 months, for that matter).

This has been a busy month for you! You got two new teeth, started babbling a bit, slept 10 hours straight for 4 nights in a row (what happened?!), started sitting up, and started some solid foods last week. You also went on your first cruise vacation to Bermuda and had a wonderful time with Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt Emily, Uncle Ryan, Joel, and us. You were a picture perfect baby. You slept when you were sleepy, played like crazy, and hardly ever fussed. You weren't such a huge fan of the beach just yet, but otherwise, you were such a wonderful traveler!

Your little personality is starting to emerge and I love it when I start seeing bits and pieces of you that I haven't seen before. You've started reaching your arms when you see me and it melts my heart. You like you run your hands over my nose (honk!) and grab onto my cheeks and pull me in close. You are ticklish and just generally a giggly baby; you like to be kissed softly in the creases of your elbows and you love the sensation of a man's beard on your hands. Your knees are very ticklish, too. I can usually get you laughing and then as I start laughing harder, so do you. Oh, I love your laugh. I could listen to that sound all day long.

I'm looking forward to watching you grow as the days progress. I don't think crawling will happen too, too far in the future; you have tried getting up on your knees a few times but haven't quite figured that out. I can't wait to hear more of the babbles come out; the sound of your voice is so precious. I just can't wait to see more of that personality emerge and continue to learn more about who you are.

Jenna, you are so precious to our family. It's hard for me to ever imagine life without you as a part of our family. You bring us so much joy and our home is filled with so much more love just because of your presence here.

I love you so much and am so thankful for your little life.

Love,

Mommy

Sleep Becomes Her

2009-06-11T18:34:00.004-04:00

*****UPDATE*****

Yes, yes you can indeed jinx infant sleep patterns by the mere mention of them on the blog. Not sure if it really was too good to be true in the first place or if it will get a TON better tonight, but last night was an awful, awful night that resulted in a looooonnnnnnggggg block of restless sleeplessness. ::yawn::

****************************

I have hesitated to write anything super official because, well, I don't know. I'm not superstitious and I don't think I will jinx it, but I was just afraid that just as I opened my big mouth, the trend would come to an end. Anyhow...

Every single night this week (so far), Jenna has slept an initial stretch of sleep of 10 hours and an additional 2-3 hour stretch before waking for the day. That means that this mama has gotten GREAT sleep all.week.long. If you know anything about my life and my journey as a mother of two, you'll know why that excites me so much. And if you don't recall and/or just plain don't know, I'll tell you. My son, the tornado, did not sleep for the better part of his first two years of life. This, my friends, is a miracle.
Oh, it feels so nice to have a sleeper! I think my body is adjusting to getting so much uninterrupted sleep because I feel tired these days. It totally doesn't make sense, but hopefully I'm just making up for these last 6+ months of sleep deprivation. It's crazy how your body gets used to living on broken and poor quality sleep. But that is not me any longer (at least not right now, ha).

Hopefully the trend will continue but, just watch...tonight will be an awful night because of me and my big mouth :)

Playing Catch Up: Memorial Day

2009-06-10T21:01:00.004-04:00

I know, I know. Memorial Day was about a million years ago and I'm just getting around to blogging about it. Truthfully, it has been on my list of things to do forever, but life gets busy and blogging takes the back seat. Actually, it usually doesn't even get a seat because the kids take up 95% of the space in my back seat and I have to have room for the rest of their junk.

But, I digress.

After I determined that Nathan was truly ready to be potty-trained by following his lead, I needed to devise a way to reinforce good behavior while "punishing" the bad. I use quotations because I didn't really want to hurt him or do him harm (obviously), I just wanted to negatively reinforce the behavior that was unacceptable. So I bought a marble jar and a bag full of marbles. I set up a reward system that looked like this:

add 2 marbles for pee pee on the potty
add 3 marbles for poops on the potty
add 1 extra marble for telling me he had to go
subtract 5 marbles for each pee pee/poop accident.
Upon filling up the marble jar, a BIG reward (that, unbeknownst to him, was not yet all figured out)

So, it did not take him long to fill up that jar. After a few accidents in the beginning days, the accidents came to a halt and the marble jar was filling up faster than I imagined. Finally, about 3-4 days before Memorial Day, the jar was full.

We decided we'd do a fun family day in Ithaca. We'd visit the Sciencenter and then go to Taughannock Falls, which happens to be one of our all-time favorite places. We headed out after breakfast and visited the Sciencenter first. We had no idea what to expect, never having visited in the past, but that place is amazing! It took us a few hours to explore and run around the place, then we ate a picnic lunch that I had packed. Afterwards, we headed over to the falls and that is where most of the fun took place. We took about 2 hours and walked up the waterfalls, following along the water the whole way up. Jenna slept soundly in her Lovey Dud wrap (LOVE IT!) the whole way up and we had such a fun time watching Nathan bound through the water. We finished the day at Chili's before heading home.

It was an awesome day and one of the funnest, happiest days I can remember having in a really long time. It was so good to be out, just the four of us, enjoying the beautiful place we live on such a beautiful day.

Happy Birthday, Babe!

2009-06-09T20:38:00.004-04:00

My Dear Husband,

6 years ago today, you turned 21 and it was your first birthday that we actually spent physically together before we would marry just a month later. We went to the waterfalls in Ithaca together. I packed a picnic lunch in our picnic basket and we sat by the water and ate together, dreaming of what it would be like to be married in just over a month. We had no idea, did we?!

Since that birthday, we have (obviously) shared lots of birthdays together. These years have taken us through mountain-tops of joys, valleys of sorrows, and lots of feelings in between. Despite where life has taken us, we have always had the solid foundation of a life built on commitment and grounded in love to fall back on.

Your birthdays always prompt me to remember how much I love you and how blessed I am to have you in my life. Truthfully, I can't imagine what my life would look like if you were not in it. It is my honor to be called your wife and I bear that title with pride. You are the epitome of integrity to me - you are who you say you are, wherever you happen to be. You are a faithful husband, loving father, and dedicated friend. Your devotion to our family is admirable...I couldn't do this thing without you.

Thanks for everything you do for me and our kids. But mostly, thank you for who you are. Our life together seems to get better with age and I can't wait to see where this next year leads us.

Happy Birthday, my love.

Love,

Back to Life, Back to Reality

2009-06-08T21:05:00.004-04:00

I have a lot to report! We just returned home from our cruise to Bermuda (which was amazing, by the way), and there is so much to write about but I just haven't had the time...EEK!!! In short, here are a few things that you'll see coming in the next few days (hopefully)...

The cruise-in-review, complete with pictures
a post about Jenna's first bites of homemade rice cereal (and pictures, too, I hope)
a post about Nathan's newest antics (potty training, funny stuff he's saying, etc)

Just a few quick notes:

I have a new niece! Adrienne Reese arrived on May 27. She is a total DOLL and she's so tiny that she makes Jenna look like a monster.
Jenna's second tooth cut through a week ago, June 1st. You never would have known that she was cutting a tooth. Miss happy was SO content and generally happy.
I decided to bite the bullet and start Jenna on solids a week early. She is a grabbing machine and I couldn't hold off any longer.
I decided to become a Martha Stewart-esque mommy and make all of Jenna's baby food. Rice cereal went down the hatch tonight without any problem. Yay!
Nathan is without-a-doubt potty trained! Yay!! More on that later...

Today was our first day back to real life and I really realized how much I love what I do. These kids aren't just attachments to my life, they are my life. At the end of the day (even the really rough ones), I can confidently say that there's no place I'd rather be than at home with my babies. These years are important ones in their growth and development and I'm so happy that I am able to stay home and watch them grow. They are both such amazing gifts from God.

Say What?

2009-05-23T14:32:00.003-04:00

Nathan is king of song. He has so many songs memorized that Luke and I often look over at each other with raised eyebrows, wondering where in the heck he learned all those songs! Lots of songs makes for lots of bloopers, and I could spend hours drumming up all the funny things he says (sings), but here are a few of my recent favorites...

The Body Song (Psalty) is one of Nathan's new favorites. Here are the actual lyrics:

I go lub dub, lub dub I go.
I am the heart, I pump like so.
I'm bringing life to all the parts,
I am consistent, I'm the heart.

Swinging, I'm swinging,
Swinging on life's merry way.
I'm the arm, I'm the arm,
Bringing grace to all.

Here are Nathan's bloopers:

I go lub dub, lub dub I go.
I am the heart, I pump like soap.
I'm bringing life to all the parts,
I am consistent, I'm the heart.

Swinging, I'm swinging,
Swinging on my smerry way!
I'm the arm, I'm the arm,
Bringing grace to all.

Ever heard the song, "Our God Reigns?" Well, we sang that song in church last Sunday and it was the first time that Nathan had ever heard it. Ever since then, he walks around the house, Gibson guitar strung around his neck, shouting/singing, "OUR GOD REIGNS, REALLY FAITH!"

I love these little mishaps and always get sad when Luke tries to correct him. I'm going to be really sad when he sings all these songs the right way one day!

A Tooth!

2009-05-19T20:45:00.003-04:00

I can't believe it's already about that time, but Jenna's first tooth appeared on the surface today! Honestly, it took me until after her afternoon nap to notice it, but lo and behold...a tooth! She popped that one about 2 weeks earlier than Nathan popped his first tooth. And it looks like her second one is not going to hold back much longer.

I just can't believe it. Where on earth did time go? How did my baby get to be old enough for TEETH?! I don't know...I love her toothless grin. I'm sure I'll love her smile when it's full of teeth (or when it just has one or two), but I do love a baby with a toothless grin ;)

Five Months

2009-05-14T20:18:00.004-04:00

My Dearest, Sweet Jenna,

Today, you are five months old. It's hard to believe that this time five months ago, that I was just getting to know you as an outside baby. We have come a long way in five months, baby. What a fun ride.

In the last month, you've done some more growing and met some more milestones. You finally rolled from your belly to your back (what took you so long, girl?!) after a nap one day last week. I went in and found you awake on your back although I put you down asleep on your belly. You did that several other times, none of which were witnessed by me, and finally you performed for me yesterday. You've also started reaching for things. Your favorite thing in the world is paper. If I could give you a napkin, paper towel, or just a sheet of paper to crinkle, you'd be in heaven all day long. Unfortunately, you've also mastered the art of bringing everything to your mouth, which usually results in you having gobs of napkin in your mouth, me prying it out of your mouth and taking the residual napkin away, and you screaming bloody murder. Ha! You are a hoot. You've also found your feet and I frequently find you bent in half as you suck your toes. It's a sweet sight for sure!

Just within the last week, you've also made a big step towards independence; you started sleeping in your own room. Much to my dismay, because I really, genuinely miss you, you have taken to your room and are no longer unhappy to do all of your naps and start the night out in your own room. I could probably get you back into your crib for the second half of the night too, but I really enjoy that extra cuddle time we get before morning time. There is nothing more precious to me than those sweet moments we spend with you curled up in my arms. You are so special.

In the month to come, I imagine that you'll learn how to sit. You do a great tripod these days and can sit up for seconds at a time, but I think you'll master that this month. In just under two short weeks, we'll welcome another cousin, who I assume will be your ultimate playmate and best friend. I am so excited for Adrienne to be born and for you two to grow up together. Mostly, I just can't wait to see your personality continue to form!

Jenna, you have captured my heart in a way that I didn't know was possible. The hopes, dreams, and thoughts I have for you are so vivid and yet I know that I cannot possibly begin to imagine all that you will be as you continue to grow. It has been a pleasure and a joy to be your mommy for these last five months and I cannot wait to spend the rest of forever watching you turn into a beautiful young lady (inside and out!).

I love you so much.

Love,

Mommy

It Won't Be Like This for Long

2009-05-11T21:31:00.003-04:00

My littlest babe will be 5 months old on Thursday. FIVE MONTHS OLD!! How did that happen already? She is quite attached to her cradle which is set up just to the left of my bed. I love the fact that she's right there because not only can she see, hear, and feel me close, but I can do the same with her. I love being able to look over and see her sleeping soundly beside my bed. I love being able to hear her first waking moments and being able to scoop her right up to comfort, console, and put her right back to sleep. I love having her next to me at night. I love having her next to me in bed even more so than I like having her in her cradle next to the bed.

But she's almost 5 months old. And she's getting pretty big for that cradle. Even despite the fact that she sleeps really well in there, I have been trying to conjure up ways to get her into her crib in her own room smoothly. I don't want it to be a traumatizing transition for her. I want her to feel comfortable in there.

The results of tonight's test are still yet to be revealed, but it's been a little bit bumpy of a road so far. But that's not what I'll remember about tonight. What I will remember tonight is the warmth of my baby's body snuggled up tight against me as I read, "Guess How Much I Love You." I will remember the sweet smell of her skin as she melted into my arms and the way that she grabbed tightly onto my shirt while nursing, as if to ask me to never leave. I will remember looking at her sweet, innocent face as I heard "Pachelbel's Cannon in D" playing in the background and I will remember the sweet thoughts I had for her in those moments.

You see, the song that was playing softly in the background was played at my wedding as a prelude to my grand entrance. And as I listened to that song playing softly in the background while I rocked my sweet baby and held her closely to me, I thought of what her life might look like years and years up the road. And it hit me. It won't always be like this. She won't always fit so snugly in my arms. One day, she'll be walking down the aisle at her own wedding. She won't always be this small.

Her life is flying by at such a fast pace. And who cares if she's almost 5 months old and happily sleeping in the cradle next to my bed? I have the utmost confidence in the fact that in just a few short months, she will be sleeping in her crib, in her own room, and I'll be missing her quiet presence next to me. For now, I'm going to relish in having and keeping her close. It won't be like this for long.

Mother's Day

2009-05-09T15:09:00.003-04:00

Motherhood has changed my life. Before kids came into the picture, I lived a care-free life pursuing my own endeavors, enjoying my new-found and highly sought after career, and enjoying married life and all of the excitement, spontaneity, and romance that comes along with being two people in love. My life was easy (though I probably thought it was hard at times) and I enjoyed living that life.

Shortly after I found out that I was pregnant with Nathan, I had people from every angle of my life (you'd be surprised if I mentioned names, or maybe you wouldn't) telling me that I was wasting my nursing education and career and ruining my life. By having children! Those comments used to bother me, no infuriate me. How dare they assume that having child and putting my career on hold to raise them was a waste! Maybe I'm used to the comments now or maybe I realize how completely ignorant these people were. Staying at home to raise my babies has not only been one of the greatest joys of my life, but also the greatest privilege. Life may be difficult, I may feel like pulling my hair out, and I may second guess what I'm doing, but with every accomplishment, every hug or kiss, every skinned knee or bruised forehead (we get a lot of those) or sick day, I am reminded that I chose the right path. And not just for these precious kids, for me.

Nathan's little life introduced to motherhood. He taught me what being a mom was all about. I've experimented on him with everything and he has turned out ok so far :) He is a sweet reward for all of my effort and hard work. Though there are days with him that make me want to run far, far away, his life is a boundless source of joy, hope, and love for me. His faith in God and love for God inspires my own walk. Nathan is, indeed, a special gift from Jesus.

Our sweet angel baby's short life came with such sadness, but it righted so many things in my life in terms of my walk with God and made me a better person. I hate on this side of eternity that I will never know this person that was once a part of my life, but I know that in Christ, I will one day meet this baby face to face in heaven. Praise God!

Our newest babe, Jenna, has provided me with unspeakable joy. The bond that I have with her, as my daughter, is so special. Every smile, every screech, and every single giggle is a blessing to my life. Her sweetness is contagious and I can't help but be happy and encouraged when she's around. Her life has confirmed even more in my heart that I was first meant to be a mother.

So, Mother's Day to me isn't really about me, although it is nice to be celebrated and to be especially loved. To me, Mother's Day is a day to celebrate the kids that made me a mom in the first place. It is about the journey of a woman who has seen and felt what life has to offer in the fast, career track and who has learned to find greater joy in the day-to-day life that involves raising and loving her children. I my not be working hard at advancing my career (yet!) but I am working hard at advancing God's Kingdom. Right now, there is no place I'd rather be.

I can't wait to add more to our fold!

A Mother is Born

Preschool

Tomorrow

Anticipation

Eight Whole Months

The End of an Era

The Ultimate Cram

Starting Over

Dear Nicholas

Nothing warms my heart like....

Blessings

One Year

Sick with a Capital "S"

Nicholas' 2-month Appointment

Play Date

The Story of Nicholas David

Bottled Up Baby

Jenna's 2nd Birthday

*Tap, Tap*

Happy 4th Birthday, Nathan!

Happy Mother's Day!

Zoo Pictures

Catch Up

Feeling Sentimental

Recovering

There Will Be a Day

"Bath"tizing

Urine So Much Trouble!

Rosy Cheeks

Sweet Nothings

Angels Unaware

Wordless Wednesday

So Long, Farewell

Three and a Half

A Stitch in Time

Daddy's Girl

Trimming the Locks

Magical

Generosity

One Year Molar, Take Three

A Time to Love

Oh Molars, Where Art Thou?

Funnies

Twelve Month Stats

One Year Old

Birthday Eve

One Year Ago Today...

Falling off the Wagon

The Ultimate Cloth

Two Steppin'

Eleven Months

All Done

Big Thoughts for Little People, by Kenneth N. Taylor

Sharing Our Story

Proving Pavlov

Meet Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

On My Way to You

Taste and See

Someday

♪ Let's All Go Down to the Pumpkin Patch ♫

Remembering

Ten Months

Coupon Book Giveaway

Turn Around

At a Loss for Words

If You Give a Mom a Cookie...

It's a New Day, It's a New Dawn...

Motherhood Means...

Preschool is Upon Us

Wordless Wednesday

Big and Beautiful

Nine Months

The Little Things

Irony Is...

Like Night and Day

Teeth #7 and #8

Tooth #6...Finally!

"Follow Me"

Eight Months

Keeper of the Home

Tap, Tap